Unsuccessful

Jokes

What do you call the part of the city where unsuccessful writers live?

The writers' block.

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After all exhaustive, unsuccessful search for a mate, what did the gay rooster say?

"At this point, any cock'll doodle do."

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"Mazel Tov, Mr. and Mrs. Fitzpatrick!" said the doctor.

"Despite our best efforts, the surgery on your conjoined twins attached at the penis was unsuccessful."

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Jim the Plumber announces that he is running for office. Now he is appearing on a news show to discuss his candidacy.

HOST: “So Jim, what got you into politics?”

JIM: “Well, ya know, recently plumbin’ don’t pay very well, and I just wanted to try something’ new, I guess.”

HOST: “So you have NO political experience whatsoever?”

JIM: “Nope. My field is in plumbin’, sir.”

HOST: “Don&rsquo


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Did you hear that Harry Potter is now an oil tycoon?

The company has had 3 unsuccessful oil drills, however Potter was quoted as saying they are "not worried" and "expecto petroleum".

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After binge watching CNN, fox, and msnbc - simultaneously - for nearly two days - a man decided he would hang himself in protest of the media's lack of integrity...

Thankfully was unsuccessful. The rope broke.

He probably would be dead right now if not for that fake noose.

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How did the unsuccessful painter die?

Art failure.

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Why was the new couple unsuccessful at their attempt to have sex at the barbeque?

She just wanted to tri-tip.

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A farmer has 3 oranges in one crate and 2 apples in another crate, what does he have?

An unsuccessful business

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THe Isle Of Case Ex

Case X was a secret government project located on an undisclosed Island. The mission was to eradicate the homosexual community through intensive brainwashing. Each day, test subjects endured physical and psychological torment. Unfortunately, the project was unsuccessful. The men were far too traumatized and far too gay for rehabilitation. Even when asked simple questions such as, "where are y


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The Isle of Case X.

Case X was a secret government project located on an undisclosed Island. The mission was to eradicate the homosexual community through intensive brainwashing. Each day, test subjects endured physical and psychological torment. Unfortunately, the project was unsuccessful. The men were far too traumatized and far too gay for rehabilitation. Even when asked simple questions such as, "where are y


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The Isle of Case X. OC

Case X was a secret government project located on an undisclosed Island. The mission was to eradicate the homosexual community through intensive brainwashing. Each day, test subjects endured physical and psychological torment. Unfortunately, the project was unsuccessful. The men were far too traumatized and far too gay for rehabilitation. Even when asked simple questions such as, "where are y


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You know the difference between successful and unsuccessful?

The UN.

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There's a new grillhouse in new York that's opening up a restaurant at the top of a skyscraper, though there are fears it could be unsuccessful

The steaks will be higher than ever!

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An unsuccessful extra-terrestrial contact

On a planet of a star of Vega, a meeting is held with an unsuccessful explorers with a mission to contact people on Earth:
"They were not friendly and refused to contact us," said the extra-terrestrial explorer, "I don't understand. All we said to them was where we were from..."


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All work and no play makes Jack

an unsuccessful stage performer.

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Why was the homeless man unsuccessful at stand-up comedy?

Because his jokes were always in poor taste ..

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My jeweller shop is super unsuccessful.

[deleted]

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Why was the manipulative ghost so unsuccessful?

People could see right through him.

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What do you call an unsuccessful Jewish pirate?

Les Goldman

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Why was the pun thief insulted that his friend predicted he would be unsuccessful?

He couldn't take a joke

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(NSFW) Last night I tried to hit the ceiling with my jizz, but just like every night, I was unsuccessful.

It was one of my many shortcomings

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Why was the London sperm bank so unsuccessful?

The were only two donors. One came on the bus, the other missed the tube.

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