Striking

Jokes

The game in the first episode of the new season of black mirror wasn't going to be called striking vipers

They wanted to call it Smash Bros but it was already taken

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After striking out, what did North America say to the on deck batter?

Europe.

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I found striking similarities with my car and my girlfriend

Both don't exist.

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I saw the most beautiful girl in the picket line.

She was truly striking.

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Did you hear about the boxer who fought his own clone?

The resemblance was striking.

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Santa was working

And year after year, his workshop got expensive, so he started phasing out the elves with trolls. The trolls were larger and not quite as smart, but they were way cheaper and about 75% as effective. Santa didn't fire any elves, but as they got old and retired, he replaced them with trolls. Over the years there came to be one single old elf that continued to hold on and work, which Santa allow


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John and Phil are in a forest...

John and Phil are in a forest, Phil says "hey man, we should start a fire" and John says "that's a great idea, but we don't have any matches", "oh, I've got one" says Phil, and he gives it to John, who goes around striking it on everything "it won't work" says John. "oh that's strange, it worked this morning!"


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She had striking features...

Two black eyes.

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My flight was delayed from birds striking against the airliner.

Wtf birds, just do your job. What are they even paying you for??? I got a connection to make.

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My wife's college friend came to visit us for the first time since we got married...

Walking into our house, she noticed the wedding pictures on the hallway wall and started to look them over.

There was a photo of me next to a man, 30 years my senior, with whom I shared a striking resemblance.

The friend asked me, "Oh, is this your father?"

"Well, yes" I replied, "that is clearly a parent."


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If the French put as much effort into working as they did striking...

They'd be unstoppable.

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There have been so many teachers striking lately,

they’ve had to postpone the next school shooting.

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A man asks the bartender: have you seen the swordsman?

Why yes, he's a very striking fellow isn't he.

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A patient in a psychiatric hospital calls the firefighters to report a fire

"HELP!" - He yells over the phone - "THE HOSPITAL IS GOING UP IN FLAMES!"
With an impressive response time the firefighters make it to the hospital in 6 minutes only to find the mentally ill individual with a couple of gallons of gasoline and striking matches in his hands.
"WOW FELLAS! -You got here so fast that I couldn't even start the fire yet!


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My wife has a striking face.

She headbutts me at least once a day.

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What did the Hindu say after striking a man with his vehicle?

Oh my gods... well, at least it wasn't a cow.

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Need help with kids

I am at dinner for mothers day and striking out with the jokes. Reddit brothers and sisters I need your kid appropriate jokes. HELP!

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Good one liner

You have a striking face.....how many times has it been struck?

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Did you hear about the guy who got slapped by his reflection whenever he looked at a mirror?

The resemblance was striking.

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Gurl, Your Daddy must've been a thief!

Cos I work at a correctional facility and you bear a striking resemblance to one of the inmates who I'm told was a thief.

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