Straining

Jokes

Are you stressed? Is there something straining your relationships? Here's your solution!

Use Young's Modulus to solve all your problems!

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I like my jokes like I like my coffee

Bitter and straining every last drop from some ground up stuff of ancient origin.

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A Russian Man is drinking Vodka in a bar...

A Russian man is drinking a large glass of vodka in a bar when he feels his heart give out and drops dead.
He is approached by a spirit who offers to grant him a wish, now that he is dead. The man thinks it over and says that he’d like to go finish his vodka.
A flash, and he’s a spider hanging from a line of web over his vodka in the bar. He wants the vodka, so he begin


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What do you call a secret agent that has multiple orgasms while straining his vegetables?

Double O Sieving

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ROYAL WEDDING

On the day of the Royal Wedding, Sofia was getting dressed, surrounded by all her family, and she suddenly realized she had forgotten to get any shoes.

Then her sister remembered that she had a pair of white shoes from her wedding so she lent them to Sofia for the day. Unfortunately, they were a bit too small and by the time the festivities were over Sofia's feet w


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On the day of the Royal wedding, Sophie was getting dressed, surrounded by all of her family....

.....She suddenly realised she had forgotten to get any shoes. Panic!

Then her sister remembered that she had a pair of white shoes from her wedding so she lent them to Sophie for the day. Unfortunately they were a bit too small and by the time the festivities were over Sophie's feet was hurting real bad.

When she and Edward withdrew to their room the only thing she


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Urine Trouble

Three old men are sitting on a park bench. One of them begins complaining to the others about his problems in the bathroom.

"I can't take it. Every morning, 8am I try and I try to take a piss but no matter how long I stand there at the toilet I can't squeeze a drop!"

The old man sitting next to him speaks up.

"That's nothing! Eve


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I was straining on the toilet this morning.

"Where's the fucking sieve?" asked my wife.

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Royal Wedding

On the day of the Royal wedding, Sophie was getting dressed, surrounded by all
of her family. She suddenly realised she had forgotten to get any shoes.
Panic!

Then her sister remembered that she had a pair of white shoes from her wedding so she lent them to Sophie for the day. Unfortunately they were a bit too small and by the time the festivities were over Sophie's f


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