Stag

Jokes

Little Johnny had an accident.

One day, while working on the family farm, Little Johnny fell and badly damaged his left eye. The doctors couldn’t save it, so it was removed.

His family didn’t have the money for a fancy prosthesis, so he dad whittled him a wooden eye, and carefully painted and lacquered it. From a distance, you couldn’t even tell it was fake.

Johnny eventually grew a


read more
UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

I found fifty bucks inside a liquor store

They were just shopping for a stag party.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Why was Harry Potter's patronus not allowed inside the club?

Coz the board said- "No Stag entry allowed".

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Stag party

Had a stag party in afghanistan last year. We hit one spot and it blew my socks off! I mean it must of been good im still legless!

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Me: Hello Mr. Reindeer

Stag: Who the fuck you calling dear?
Me: Why you gotta be mean doe?

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

What is the difference between a Turkish stag beetle and a Chinese man with a small penis?

[deleted]

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

A bloke is in a queue at the supermarket...

...when he notices that the rather dishy blonde behind him has just raised her hand and smiled hello to him.

He is rather taken aback that such a looker would be waving to him, and although familiar he can’t place where he might know her from, so he says “sorry do you know me?”

She replies “I maybe mistaken, but I thought you might be the father o


read more
UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

What do you call a celibate egotistical stag?

No fucking idea.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Why shouldn't the people of Westeros want Robert Baratheon to be the king?

Because that would result in stag-nation.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

I want to buy the most elevated premium male deer, but it doesn't need to have the highest prize stag.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Postman told me he was going on holidays....

I asked him if it was Parcelona or Istampbul he was headed to...

Just said it was a stag do for his friend

Ah, an all mail party I exclaimed

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

What do you call Hitler's bachelor party?

The Reich-stag!

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

What do you call a stag with his eyes gouged out

no eye deer.

What if he's in the path of a car?

Still no eye deer

What if he's mid coitus too?

Still fucking no eye deer

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE