Spontaneous

Jokes

How did the orphan with one leg die?

Spontaneous combination.

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So my brother's girlfriend was recently diagnosed with cancer, and when she told him, he proposed to her on the spot!

So see ladies, we guys can be spontaneous and romantic. We just don't like long term commitments.

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My psychiatrist said I need to be more spontaneous.

So I raped her.

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What do we call the ejaculate of a pyromaniac?

Spontaneous Cumbustion.

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I read to keep a relationship interesting, you need to be spontaneous. So yesterday while eating dinner I started going down on my husband.

And they’ll never let us into that chic fil a again.... we didn’t do it there, we did it at home. It’s just that we’re gay

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My wife told me to be more spontaneous and funny...

But she was all screaming and tears, when I banged on the kitchen window dressed in a clown outfit!

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Doctor

How do you know, out-of 300 people, which one is the doctor?



He will tell you spontaneous


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I once dated a girl who died because of spontaneous human combustion.

She was pretty hot.

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I've decided how I want to commit suicide-spontaneous combustion.

But I can't stop thinking about it.

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Women say they want a man who is funny and spontaneous

But you knock on their bedroom window at midnight in a clown costume and suddenly it's all screaming and throwing things and police helicopters.

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What do you call a spontaneous fish that loves new-age techno?

Carp EDM

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Why did the watermelon and the honeydew decide to cancel their spontaneous wedding in Las Vegas?

They realized with a family like theirs, they really Cantaloupe.

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What do you call a spontaneous man named Lee?

spontaneously

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AskWomen threads always be like: Just had sex with 4 guys I met at the bar tonight, what crazy, spontaneous things have you done lately?

[deleted]

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Anniversary Gift

A man walks into a travel agency. He approaches the travel agent and says, "Hello. My fortieth anniversary is coming up and I'd like to plan a special trip for my wife."

"Wow," replies the travel agent, "Forty years? How do you keep the magic alive for so long?"

"Well," replies the man, "For us, it's all about keeping


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A rock star doing a stage dive has spontaneous diarrhoea

That's when shit hit the fans.

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Plan to be spontaneous...

Tomorrow.

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A triangle posts a personal ad in the local paper.

It reads: passionate, fun, and spontaneous individual seeks same- no squares please.

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I'm planning on being more spontaneous in the future

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Christina

Christina went out clubbing with her friends. She was drinking and having an ok time at first, but soon she started getting bored. There were no guys there that she liked, one of her friends was making out with some dude and paying no attention to her, and the other kept complaining about her relationship issues. So Christina decided to go home.

On her way back - she was going by foot


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The girl I met last week said she wanted a guy who was "funny and spontaneous"

I showed up at her kitchen window late at night wearing a clown suit and suddenly it's all panic and screaming...

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These are from the days when game show responses were spontaneous, not scripted like they are now. Or were they?

[deleted]

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