One night, H. P. Lovecraft woke up screaming
His wife, disturbed from her slumber by his yelling, tried to comfort him.
"Howard, dear, what's wrong?"
"Oh, it was ghastly and unfathomable!" Lovecraft declared. "I have had the most dreadful nightmare! I have seen a vision of America's future!"
"What was wrong with the chap?" His wife said.
What contains a small dog and an insect?
I don't know what's more repugnant--the fact that I've been sleeping with members of my staff...
...or the fact that I'm self employed.