Reassuring

Jokes

So i went to have a prostate exam the other day

The doctor told me to take my underwear and trousers off, but i had a Complete mindblank moment and said "Where should i put them?"

He looked at me with reassuring eyes and replied "Just pop them next to mine".

I wish all doctors were this considerate.

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A Chinese couple get married

The young bride is a virgin and on the wedding night cowers naked under the sheets as her husband undresses. He climbs in next to her and tries to be reassuring. " My darling, I know this is your first time and you are frightened ... I promise you, I will do anything you want. What do you want?"

She smiles coyly and says, " I want number 69."

"Now


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I have this little bump on my head.

My doctor keeps calling it a “two more” but I keep reassuring him there’s only one bump.

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Hey guys. What's the most reassuring thing about the Riot Police presence in Hong Kong right now?

*Their guns are probably made in China.*

yuk yuk yuk

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A woman has a baby

and is very tired after an extremely long labour and falls asleep. When she wakes up, she sees the the nurse, bouncing her baby up and down like a basket ball.

"Oh my god," she exclaimed, "My baby, my baby! What are you doing with my baby?"

"Oh it's OK my dear," said the nurse in a reassuring voice, "It's dead anyway."


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I Like The Way You're Thinking

dr bob had sex with one of his patients and couldnt get over it
there was a soft reassuring voic that said"bob ur not the first doctor to sleep with his patint and ur not the last" but ther was another voice that said "bob. ur a vetrinarian"
note the title is supposed to be doctor bob


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My wife ran into the house...

"Guess what!" she said, "I got a new job down the street on the corner.''

''What!'' I replied, ''It better not be what I think it is!...You'll bring shame on the family!.. What will the neighbours say?"

''No, no, stop worrying'' she said reassuring me, ''Not in the Tescos!.....


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