A conversation between my girlfriend and I that I consider the magnum opus of comedy.
So I was driving down I4 with my girlfriend. And we come across the sign that says Boardwalk Burgers. So I turn to my girlfriend and I say "Boardwalk Burgers? More like bored burgers. Because those burgers aren't having any fun."
I've been working on my best ice cream creation ever but it got infected.
It's my Magnum O'pus.
Most bizarre suicide.
"On 23 March 1994, the medical examiner viewed the body of Ronald Opus and concluded that he died from a shotgun wound of the head. The decedent had jumped from the top of a ten- story building intending to commit suicide (he left a note indicating his despondency). As he fell past the ninth floor, his life was interrupted by a shotgun blast through a window, which killed him instantly. Neit