Narrow

Jokes

What does the bible say?

Those people who are against gay marriage and say, "In Genesis, it was Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve.", are so narrow minded...


Everyone knows that in Genesis it was Phil Collins, Tony Banks, and Mike Rutherford.

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A professor was one day walking along a very narrow street when he came face to face with a rival.

The street was too narrow for two to pass. The rival, pulling himself up to his full height, said haughtily, "I never make way for fools!"

Smiling, the professor stepped aside and said,

"I always do."

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What do you get if you cross a four-lane highway and a narrow footpath?

Closer to your intended destination.

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I sincerely hope for Daenerys that Jon Snow isn't the one to sit on the Iron Throne...

After all she's seen and done, from Meereen to Astapor and across the narrow sea, losing the Throne to Jon is really going to leave her with Aegon her face.

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After more than a decade, Tiger Woods finally won a Masters.

Looks like he's finally on the straight and narrow

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In a long lost episode, Superman has a close shave with death because his cloak wasnt the right size.

It was a narrow S cape.

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An irritable old man runs into a kid on a narrow path

The path isn't wide enough for two people to go side by side. The grumpy old man, who hates kids, refuses to move to the side, and says "I don't give way to assholes".

​

"That's ok, I do", says the kid and lets the old man cross.

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Potatoes

A girl potato and boy potato had eyes for each other and, finally, they got married,
and had a little sweet potato, which they called 'Yam.'
Of course, they wanted the best for Yam.
When it was time, they told her about the facts of life.
They warned her about going out and getting half-baked, so she wouldn't get accidentally mashed, and get a bad name for h


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It would be hard to narrow down who the best salesman in the world is.

I personally believe it’s the first man to sell a blind person sunglasses.

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If you want to make heaven, you must watch your weight...

‬ ‪Because The road is very narrow.

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Someone told me that I have a very narrow worldview

Well... that's how we Asians see things.

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The Thai rescue divers were given tight trunks to wear as they maneuvered through the narrow caves

So they wouldn’t Bangkok.

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What do you call Medusa when she's a cat stuck in a narrow alley?

A tight pussy that makes you hard

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I learnt two things today:




1. Sofa sex can be wild and exciting.

2. The staff in DFS are quite narrow-minded.

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What advice would you give a narrow tree?

Branch out.

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Did you hear about the archer that was murdered?

It's a shame, he was on the straight 'n narrow path.

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Pinwheel Smith

A woman arrives at the Pearly and meets Saint Peter. She says, "I was supposed to look up my husband when I got here." Saint Peter asks, "What's his name?" She answers, "Smith." Saint Peter replies, "I've got hundreds of thousands of Smiths here, could you narrow it down a little?" She responds, "His name is John Smith." Saint Peter says


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How often did the architect have to put long narrow paths in his blueprints?

Hallways

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I found my wife masturbating with a long, narrow loaf of picked bread.

[deleted]

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A man was walking down a narrow lane in Belfast

[deleted]

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Those people who are against gay marriage and say...

''In Genesis it was Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve'', are so narrow minded..

Everyone knows that in Genesis it was Phil Collins, Tony Banks and Mike Rutherford..

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What do you get when two Canadians are trying to pass each other in a narrow hallway?

A sorry state of affairs.

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Two Nuns went out of their convent to do some grocery shopping

They went around the town on their bicycles and had a ball of a time, since they don't usually get to roam about and the convent was soooo boring. So of course they lose track of time wandering around and exploring the town.


>"Oh my! We've only ten minutes to get back!" said the first nun.

>"Follow me, I know a shortcut!"


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Do you know what Western liberals call narrow-eyed Asians?

[deleted]

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Do you know how Western liberals call narrow-eyed Asians?

[deleted]

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Two hunters were driving down a narrow two lane road in an off-road jeep, and saw a sign that said 'Bear Left'...

They turned around and went home.

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The job interviewer asked about my previous experience.

"Well," I began, "I got the bus. Got lost for a while, walked down some narrow roads and I ended up here."

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Why couldn't the BMW fit into a narrow parking stall at Target?

because it was being driven by a woman

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I almost got killed because my Superman cloak wasn't the correct size.

It was a narrow "S" cape.

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What is Long and narrow and becomes bigger when given a blow ?

A balloon.

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For years I thought my kid had a leaning disability..... Turns out it was a typo. Still.... It's been tough keeping him on the straight and narrow!

[deleted]

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Comeback is real!

A professor and a fool

A professor was walking along a very narrow hall when he came face to face with a rival.
The passage way was too narrow for two to pass.
The rival, pulling himself up to his full height, said with a sneer,
“I never make way for fools!”

Smiling, the Gracious Professor stepped aside and with a bow replied, “I Always


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A guy goes to a doctor...

A guy goes to a doctor complaining his elbow his aching. Doctor asks him to bring in a urine sample.

Guy is seriously mad, and thinks: "I have an aching elbow and he asks for urine sample?" So he decides to mess with the doctor and mixes his cats urine with his wifes and returns it to the doctor.

Day after he gets a call from the doctor and doctor says: "Yo


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3 feminists go camping

3 feminists decide to rough it for a weekend. None has ever been to the spot they're camping in, but a friend has told them all about it and given them directions from the campsite to the nearby privy.

They arrive at twilight and make camp. After exchanging tales of social justice for a few hours and burning men in effigy over a roaring campfire, one of them heads off to use the


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Three feminists go camping

Amy, Beth and Clara decide to rough it for a weekend in the backwoods of Bristol. None has ever been to the spot they're camping in, but a friend has told them all about it and given them directions from the campsite to the nearby privy.

They arrive at twilight and make camp. After exchanging tales of social justice for a few hours over a roaring campfire, Amy exclaims "Bl


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Oh no! A long narrow body of water! We can't go left, we can't go right, we can't go backward... There's only one direction we can go.

Fjord.

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A man is driving up a steep, narrow mountain road

A man is driving up a steep, narrow mountain road. A woman is driving down the same road. As they pass each other, the woman leans out of the window and yells "PIG!!!"

The man immediately leans out of his window and replies, "BITCH!!!"

They each continue on their way, and ..... as the man rounds the next
corner, he crashes into a pig in the middl


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A woman arrives at the Pearly Gates...

...and meets Saint Peter. She says, "I was supposed to look up my husband when I got here."

Saint Peter asks, "What's his name?"

She answers, "Smith."

Saint Peter replies, "I've got hundreds of thousands of Smiths here, could you narrow it down a little?"

She responds, "His name is John Smith


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My mother asked me why I no longer talk to my fat, gay friend...

I'm back on the straight and narrow.

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What's black, white, and red all over and can't turn around in a narrow hallway?

A nun with a spear through her head.

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I realized why so many more men are astronauts.

It's because we get our training when we pee.

* We're working within a narrow margin.

* A modest overshot means an unsatisfactory splashdown.

* If we screw up, our own satisfaction be damned, we're pissing off more than ourselves.

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You're going to have to be more specific

Did you see that slut?
Which one?
The one wearing Ugg boots and a North Face Jacket.
Was that supposed to narrow it down?

Apologies if repost, I don't remember where I heard it

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911 Joke

Knock Knock.
Who's there?
9/11.
9/11 Who?
(eyes narrow) You said you'd never forget.

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I was walking along a narrow cliff top when...

a gorgeous woman was coming from the opposite direction. I didn't know whether to block her passage or toss myself off.

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