Mutant

Jokes

What do you call transsexuals with mutant superpowers?

Ex-Men.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

What do you call an ant who is dumb?

A mutant

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

What do you call an ant who is deaf?

A mutant

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

I was raped by a teenage mutant ninja turtle last night

But couldn’t identify him to the police because he wasn’t wearing a mask

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

The X-Men and Fantastic Four team up horribly

Mr. Fantastic: so, Professor X, tell us, who’s the threat we’re facing today?
Professor X: His name is Terrario, a powerful mutant with the power to control ALL ROCK MATERIAL!
*Mr. Fantastic looks at Ben Grimm*
Mr. Fantastic: ...so here’s the thing

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

4 year old son just got me with a dad joke I hadn't heard before

My son was playing with his teenage mutant ninja turtle action figures, and was making them fight each other.

Me: "Where are their weapons? Are they just fighting with their bare hands?"

Son: "No, they are fighting with their turtle hands."

Doesn't have a clue why I was laughing so hard.

Edit: mutant added**


read more
UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

How do the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles like their Islamic terrorism?

RADICAL!

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

The top post for the day is a lie.

Do a search on Reddit for teenage mutant ninja turtles. Check the top 10ish results. Two come up with identical titles. What a thief and a liar.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

What's the scariest letter to Pirates?

A mutant 'e'

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

What's the scariest letter to Pirates?

A mutant 'e'

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

What's the scariest letter to Pirates?

A mutant 'e'

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

What's the scariest letter to Pirates?

A mutant 'e'

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

It mustve been a busy time for the teenage mutant ninja turtles

During the time sung about in we didn’t start the fire, about trouble in the sewers

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Is Caitlin Jenner a mutant?

Yes, she is part of the X-Men

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

My 4 year old son just got me with a dad joke I hadn't heard before.

My son was playing with his teenage mutant ninja turtle action figures, and was making them fight each other.

Me: "Where are their weapons? Are they just fighting with their bare hands?"

Son: "No, they are fighting with their turtle hands."

Doesn't have a clue why I was laughing so hard.

Edit: mutant added**


read more
UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Pirate Joke

How did the captain know he was about to lose his ship when he looked in the mirror?



He saw he had mutant ears.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

I got attacked and mugged by a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle

I got Attacked and mugged by a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle.

Ironically, he wasn't wearing a mask, so I couldn't Idenitfy him.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

I was recently raped by a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle.

Although, ironically he wasn't wearing a mask, so I don't know which one it was.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Hey, give us back our alphabet, butthole!

Hey, Phoenicians, the Egyptians called, and they want their Proto-Sinaitic script back, since it's based on their hieroglyphs. Buttholes.

Hey! Greeks! The Phoenicians called, and they want their alphabet back!

Hey, Romans! The Greeks called, and they want their alphabet back!

Hey! Englishmen! The Romans called, and they want their alphabet back!


read more
UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

What do you call a three-humped camel?

A mutant.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

What do you call a mutant with the power to get women pregnant

Impregneato

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

My friend was raped by a teenager mutant ninja turtle.

He wasn't wearing a mask, so we don't know which one did it.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

What do you call a team of Christian mutant superheroes?

The A-Men

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

My 4 year old son just got me with a dad joke I hadn't heard before

My son was playing with his teenage mutant ninja turtle action figures, and was making them fight each other.
Me: "Where are their weapons? Are they just fighting with their bare hands?"
Son: "No, they are fighting with their turtle hands."
Doesn't have a clue why I was laughing so hard.
Edit: mutant added**
Edit 2: to those who are telling m


read more
UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

My 4 year old son just got me with a dad joke I hadn't heard before.

My son was playing with his teenage mutant ninja turtle action figures, and was making them fight each other.

Me: "Where are their weapons? Are they just fighting with their bare hands?"

Son: "No, they are fighting with their turtle hands."

Doesn't have a clue why I was laughing so hard.

Edit: mutant added**


read more
UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

What Kind Of Fruit Can Turn You Into A Mutant?

Halley Berries.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Why do the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles burn all their bank statements?

Because they don't want to have a Shredder in the house.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Did you hear that one of the teenage mutant ninja turtles killed himself?

[deleted]

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

What do you call a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle with bad hair?

Donny Trump

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

I've just been robbed by a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle

Though ironically, he wasn't wearing a mask so I don't know which one he was.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

My daughter wanted me to treat her like a princess

So I let her get stolen by a giant, mutant turtle.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

How many teenage mutant ninja turtules does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. It's a huge problem.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

A guy goes to a fancy dress party with his girlfriend on his back....

When asked what he has come as he tells everyone, "I'm a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle of course"
"What's that on your back then???"
"Oh, that's Michele he replies"

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Why do the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles hate office work?

Because they can't stand the Shredder!

:3

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Have you heard about the mutant mathematicians?

They're multiplying!

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Do you think the writers for all the teenage mutant ninja turtle movies had trouble deciding if Krang should be in them?

Because I think it must have been a no brainer

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Jubilee is a mutant who can shoot sparks from her hands, and spontaneously destroy electronics by touching them...

So she's basically like my mom, if my mom could shoot sparks from her hands.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

A mutant walks up to some city workers replacing a street lamp...

He asks one of the guys who is supervising "How many government workers does it take to change a light, Bub?"

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

If Hugh Jackman plays Wolverine as a mutant, who played Wolverine before he was mutated?

Jack Human

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

An idea for a competition.

There could be a sports competition for 13-17 kids, with base-pair DNA sequence change syndrom. They would be jumping over obstacles in black robes, throwing shurikens.

Or as I would call it: Teenage Mutant Ninja Hurdles.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

When the TMNT Tell a Secret

I wonder if when the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles tell a secret, they say Donatello anyone

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Kitty Pryde walks into a bar

Something is disrupting her mutant power.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

What would you call an uprising at Charles Xavier's school?

A mutant-y

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

What do you tell the teenage mutant ninja turtle Raphael when he picks up a miniature version of his weapons?

Those are the wrong Sais.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

What do you say to the teenage mutant ninja turtle Raphael when he is holding a miniature version of his weapons?

Those are the wrong Sais

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE