Lisp

Jokes

What does a cat with a lisp catch?

A mouth.

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Why must you stop making fun of the fat girl with a lisp?

She's thick and tired of it.

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I asked the guy with a lisp why they named the ice planet Hoth in Star Wars...

...he said "because it was so Hoth-stile"

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I asked the guy with a lisp why they named the ice planet Hoth in Star Wars...

[deleted]

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Does anyone know of any actors that can help cure my lisp?

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A woman with a lisp walks into a lesbian bar and informs the bartender she's allergic to peanuts.

The bartender replies, "I already knew that when you came in."

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What does a horny mathematician with a lisp do to have fun?

**Math debates**

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What do you call a kid with one arm, no legs, wears and eye patch and has a lisp?

Names. That’s what you call him

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What does an ill person with a lisp and someone with generous thighs have in common?

They’re thick

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Whoever coined the word "lisp"

Was a real ath-hole.

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Imagine if the Titanic had a lisp.

It's unthinkable.

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What movie was based on the life of Othkar Thindler?

Schindler's Lisp

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I ground up the stems of some plants to spray all over the lisp convention next week.

They're gonna be pithed.

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Everybody is all about "May the fourth be with you" because of Star Wars.

Meanwhile people with a lisp are complaining, "you bathtardth, we've been thayin it the thame way for yearth and nobody hath ever done thit for uth!!!!"

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Why was the detective with a lisp called hanger?

He always clothsed the case

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A man goes to the doctor about a lisp.

He says, “Doc I feel fine, it’th juth that I can’t thpeak clearly. I have thith lithp that I can’t theem to get rid of.”

The doctor replies, “Ok, let me have a look then.” and proceeds to examine the man. “Ahh, I see the problem here. Your penis is so long that it’s weight is pulling on your vocal chords, causing the lisp. We can c


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Almost made a joke about an amphetamine addict with a lisp...

But that’s methed up.

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Why should you never make fun of a fat girl with a lisp?

Because she's thick and tired of it.

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What is it called when a Nazi has a speech impediment?

Schindler’s lisp

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You should never make fun of a a fat person with a lisp.

They’re probably thick and tired of it.

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Do you know what the hardest job in the world is?

Being a straight guy with lisp trying to sell peanuts.

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A man with a lisp....

So there was this man who had a lisp... he went to the city for the first time in a long time to get a pet.

He decides to get some lunch at a nearby bakery and asks '' hello mith may i hath a bum?''
The baker ask for him to repeat
He says it again and points to the buns.

He buys the bun and goes to the pet store and asks the store o


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The owner of the local strip club has a lisp.

I tried to go late last night, but they were clothed.

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Imagine the titanic with a lisp

It's unthinkable

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I started a new job the other day.

So I started this new job the other day and one of my co workers are literally the most generic gay ever, you know those gays with the lisp? and he spots this sight seeing dog and he goes


"Oh mah ghawd I wahna peht him he's sho cute"

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A man with a lisp is arrested on drug charges

When his family asks what happened he responds:

"I gueth I really methed up"

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A man with a lisp gets arrested for drug charges

When asked by police why he shot up, he responded:

"I methed up"

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Whenever I tell girls that Im a thespian it never has the intended effect

I hate my fucking lisp.

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What did the man with the lisp say when his wife outright denied his request to spend a weekend at a nudist colony?

Would ya thtop being tho clothes-minded?

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I was kicked out of my church for suggesting Jesus may have spoke with a lisp

It was a real slap in the faith.

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I want to write a mystery novel about a hermaphrodite with a lisp.

I'll call it *Man or Myth?*

~Stuart Francis

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What kinda snake has a lisp?

A Mike Python

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A boy with a lisp gets caught by his parents sucking another mans Penis by his parents. The parents ask him, are you gay?

“Yeah, queerly!”

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Imagine the titanic with a lisp.

Its un-thinkable!

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Why do you not make fun of a fat girl with a lisp?

Because she is thick and tired of it

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Toothbrush

A man with a lisp went in to interview for a job as a toothbrush salesman. He had a very heavy lisp and during the interview the manager told him he would not be a good salesman for their product.

The man with the lisp told him, I am a very good salesman and I can sell anything.

The manager said, “Fine, if you can sell 100 toothbrushes by the end of the day you can


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What do you call a superhero that got his ass kicked for having a lisp?

He's Thor

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A boy with a lisp had trouble pronouncing the 'sw' sound...

A teacher was asking her students about hobbies, when she came across one of her students who had a lisp. He always had difficulties with the 'sw' sound as in swallow and swell.

"What's your favourite hobby?" she asked.

"'Wimmin'," he replied.

"Oh! And what do you do?"

"Oh, I just dive i


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What did the slightly frozen chicken with a bad lisp say as it crossed the road and help up traffic?

"I'm thaw-y!"

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Can you believe I was kicked out of my church for claiming Jesus spoke with a lisp?

It was a real slap in the faith.

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That receptionist with the lisp and big booty wasn't at work today

She must have called in thicc

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Stop making fun of that overweight girl with a lisp

She's thick and tired of it

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The government denied tax exemption for my church that believes Jesus spoke with a lisp

It was a real slap in the faith

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The government denied tax exemption for my church that believes Jesus spoke with a lisp

It was a real slap in the faith

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What do you call a group of people painting at a speech therapist office?

Painting with a lisp

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The girl with the big butt and lisp wasnt in the office today..

I guess she called in thicc

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The girl with a big butt and a lisp isnt in the office today

I guess she called in thicc

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The girl with the lisp and the big ass isnt at work today

She must’ve called in thick

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The girl with the lisp and the big ass isnt at work today

she must've called in thick

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The girl with the lisp and the big ass isnt at work today

She must’ve called in thick

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