Gonorrhea

Jokes

What is the difference between an STD and some place that doesn't exist anymore?

One is gonorrhea, the other is a gone area.

Ill show myself out now

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You managed to get gonorrhea from a sloth?

*slow clap*

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4 years ago I got gonorrhea and a surprising amount of people were weirdly excited for me when I complained about it.

It's back again and I'm looking forward to all the support when I tell people that I feel the burn.

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Just found out that my girlfriend gave me an STD.

I'm gonorrhea-valuate our relationship.

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Two people prepare to have sex for the first time, but one of them hesitates

"Wait a minute, isn't this a little rash?"

"No, it's gonorrhea."

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Went fishing with a girl I met at the bar....

Caught gonorrhea.

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Two army boys, Leroy amp Jasper....

Two Army boys, Leroy & Jasper, from the hills of Kentucky were promoted right from privates to Sergeants because of their great marksmanship with rifles.

Not long after, they're out for a walk and Leroy says, "Hey, Jasper, There's the NCO Club. Let's you and Me stop in." "But we's privates," protests Jasper. "We's sergeants no


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So this guy gets a nasty infection and goes to the Doctor...

Sir, I have good news and bad news for you.

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Really? What's the good news?


Well, Mr. Gonorrhea...

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Tiger Woods gave me gonorrhea!

*golf clap*

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Many things are gone and forgotten, what's gon but never forgotten?

Gonorrhea

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What did Erwin Schrdinger say when he finally looked inside the box?

You're right darling. It's definitely gonorrhea.

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What is an onomatopoeia for gonorrhea?

Applause? The clap!

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Gonorrhea, HIV, condominium, herpes: which is not like the others?

Gonorrhea, it's the only one you can get rid of.

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A German shepherd and a Bulldog are sitting beside each other at the Vet's

The Bulldog asks the German Shepherd: Where's your pet?

German Shepherd: Wait what? Isn't this the hospital? I need to get my gonorrhea infection treated.

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Mother Superior called all the nuns in and said "We have a case of gonorrhea in the convent"

An elderly nun spoke up and said "Oh thank God, I'm sick of Chardonnay"

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What do you call an orgy with people that have Gonorrhea?

A round of applause.

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What do you call an orgy where everyone has gonorrhea?

A round of applause.

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They call me gonorrhea...

Because I got that drip

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What do you get when you have unprotected sex with the Kool-Aid guy?

Gonorrhea.

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I just got a Tinder Surprise.

The surprise was gonorrhea.

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I just got a Tinder Surprise.

The surprise was gonorrhea.

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"What's gonorrhea?" asked my girlfriend.

"Let me show you," I said, slowly reaching down. My girlfriend began to frown

Then I pulled a dictionary out of my pocket.

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I was traveling in Thailand and got awful Diarrhea. Luckily, that night a woman gave me something to fix it.

She called it, "Gonorrhea."

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The Illness

A man returned from a business trip to Dubai feeling nauseous and looking ghastly. He rushed to the ER and was immediately put through some medical tests.


After a few days of experiencing excruciating pain throughout his body, the doctor walks into the room holding his medical report.
"I'm very sorry to tell you that you have contracted a rare, contagious and ve


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Skeeter and Bubba got promoted from Privates to Sergeants.

Shortly after, they were out walking when Bubba said "Hey Skeeter! There's the NCO Club! What say we go in there and have us a drink?"

"But we don't belong in the NCO Club!" Skeeter protested. "We's Privates!"

Bubba points to the new stripes sewn on their clothes and says, "No we ain't, Skeeter! We's Sergeant


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I used to have diarrhoea...

But now it's gonorrhea

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What is it called when you get rid of gonorrhea?

A clapback.

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What do you call it when someone gets gonorrhea multiple times

*Applause*

I just made this up, i know it's terrible but at least its not a repost (I think).

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Two Privates

Two good ol’ boys, Bubba and Junior get promoted from Privates to Sergeants.
Not long after, they’re out for a walk and Bubba says, “Hey, Junior - there’s the NCO Club.
Let’s you and me stop in and have us a drank.”
“But we’s privates,” protests Junior.
“NO, we’s sergeants now,” says Bubba, pulling him


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Angry after the primary season, Jeb Bush had sex with a hooker, hoping to give her gonorrhea...

Please clap.

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The fisherman

A man and his wife are staying at a lake cottage when they notice a couple driving up one day with a "Just Married" sign on the back of their car. Every morning he sees the man who just got married head out to fish in a row boat all day long. After a week of seeing this, the man says to his wife, "I'm going to say hello to that young man and make sure things are okay with him a


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How hot is it?

It's so hot that people with gonorrhea are at the health department complaining that they're experiencing a cooling sensation when they pee.

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I met this girl whilst I was playing Pokemon

Now I have GOnorrhea

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My father found the cure for gonorrhea.

It was under the TV guide where he left it.

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If a kid with Down Syndrome gets Gonorrhea

Is it called "Slow Clap"?

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My love for you is like gonorrhea...

It burns!

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What's the difference between Sanders spam on Reddit and gonorrhea?

[deleted]

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What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas

Yeah? Tell it to my gonorrhea.

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Lance Corporals

Two good old boys, Billy Bob and Cletus have been promoted from privates to Lance Corporals.
Not long afterward, they're out for a walk and Billy Bob says, "Hey, Cletus, there's the NCO Club; let's you and me step in."
"But we be only privates," protests Cletus.
"We're Lance Corporals now," says Billy Bob, pointing to his stripe a


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Do you know what they call it when you get Gonorrhea twice?

The Applause!

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My dad just recently got gonorrhea...

I guess he shouldn't have gone to Korea.

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I was kicked out of the military because I got gonorrhea

It was a dishonorable discharge

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I was kicked out of the army because I got gonorrhea

It was a dishonorable discharge

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I was kicked out of the army because I had gonorrhea

[deleted]

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What's green and yellow and eats black nuts?

Racist Gonorrhea.

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What is diarrhea called when it goes away?

Gonorrhea.

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What do you call it when Zeus gets gonorrhea?

Thunderclap

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What do you call it when your diarrhea finally goes away?

Gonorrhea.

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What doesn't belong? Herpes ...

Guy: What does not belong on this list: Herpes, gonorrhea, and an apartment in Cleveland.

Another Guy: The apartment , duuh

Guy: Nope, it's gonorrhea - it's the only one you can get rid of...

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My sex life is ruined

Yesterday my doctor diagnosed me with a disease which will ruin my sex life forever.

Your probably thinking Gonorrhea, Chlamydia or Aids!

It's much worse than that!

I've got arthritis in my hands!

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