Floored

Jokes

My teacher told the class to take out our colored pencils. I was floored by her bigotry. So I yelled at her...

....ACTUALLY, politically correct term is African-American pencils.

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A senior citizen drove his brand new BMW out the car sales room .

Taking off down the motor-way , he floored it to 90 , enjoying the wind blowing through . Amazing he thought as he flew down the Motor Way, looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a police car behind him , blue light flashing, siren blaring .
''I can get away from him - no problem!'' He floored it to 130 , then 140 ...then 150 ...
Suddenly, he thought , ''


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Brand new Corvette

A senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership. Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little gray hair he had left. "Amazing," he thought as he flew down I-94, pushing the pedal even more.

Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a state trooper behind him, lights flashing and siren blaring.


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An old guy just bought a brand new corvette.

Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little gray hair he had left. "Amazing," he thought as he flew down I-94, pushing the pedal even more. Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a state trooper behind him, lights flashing and siren blaring. He floored it to 100 mph, then 110, then 120. Suddenly he thought, "What am I doing? I�


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A senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership.

Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little gray hair he had left. "Amazing," he thought as he flew down I-94, pushing the pedal even more. Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a state trooper behind him, lights flashing and siren blaring. He floored it to 100 mph, then 110, then 120. Suddenly he thought, "What am I doing? I�


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An old Texas Oil Man drove his brand new Corvette out of the dealership...

Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little gray hair he had left
 

*“Amazing!”* he thought as he flew down I-20, pushing the pedal even more.
 

Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a state trooper behind him, lights flashing and siren blaring. He floored it to 100 mp


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There was a middle aged guy who bought a Mercedes convertible 2000....

He took off down the road, flooring it up to 80 mph and enjoying the wind blowing through what little hair he had left on his head.

"This is great", he thought and floored it some more.

He looked in his rear-view mirror and there was a State Patrol behind him, blue lights flashing and siren blasting.

"I can get away from him with no problem&quo


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The old Man and the State Trooper

A senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership. Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little gray hair he had left. "Amazing," he thought as he flew down I-94, pushing the pedal even more. Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a state trooper behind him, lights flashing and siren blaring. He floored it


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When I figured out that people walk on hardwood and carpet,

I was floored.

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Why were Jeremy Clarkson's colleagues excited to try his mulled wine?

Because they'd been floored by his punch.

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I tripped on a "slippery when wet" sign today.

I was floored by the irony.

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The installers put down my new hardwood really quickly.

They floored it.

(Was the reply when I told a friend that the installers were almost done)

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The Old Man amp The Trooper

A senior citizen drove his brand new Lexus convertible out of the dealership. Taking off down the road and onto the highway, he floored it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little hair he had left.

"Amazing," he thought as he flew down the interstate pushing the pedal even more.

Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw the highway patrol behind hi


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A Senior Citizen

Drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership. Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little gray hair he had left. "Amazing," he thought as he flew down the highway pushing the pedal even more. Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a state trooper behind him, lights flashing and siren blaring. He floored it to 100 mph


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What did the spilled noodles say to the sauce pan?

I'm floored!

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A Brand New Corvette

A senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership. Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little gray hair he had left. "Amazing," he thought as he flew down I-94, pushing the pedal even more.

Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a state trooper behind him, lights flashing and siren blaring.


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The senior citizen and the Corvette.

A senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership.

Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little gray hair he had left. "Amazing," he thought as he flew down I-94, pushing the pedal even more.

Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a state trooper behind him, lights flashing and


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Old guy bought a new car

A senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership. Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little gray hair he had left. "Amazing," he thought as he flew down I-94, pushing the pedal even more. Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a state trooper behind him, lights flashing and siren blaring. He floored it


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Did you hear about the legless man who got his wheelchair taken away?

He was floored.

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Good day officer

He got his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership. Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little hair he had left. "Amazing," he thought as he flew down I-75, pushing the pedal even more. Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw the highway patrol behind him, blue lights flashing and siren blaring.
He floored it to 100


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"Have a good day, sir"



He got his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership. Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little hair he had left. "Amazing," he thought as he flew down I-75, pushing the pedal even more. Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw the highway patrol behind him, blue lights
flashing and siren blaring.


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Pest Control

There is a church that is infested with rats. No amount of traps or exterminators have any effect on the still growing population. One day the local pastor thinks up a plan. The next day, all the rats are gone. The people are floored and asked what he did. He replies by saying that he baptized them and they will only be back on Christmas and Easter.


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Why did the Muslim cross the road?

I said to my self as I floored the accelerator. Although I guess he did get to the other side.

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The police vs the senior citizen

A senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership. Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little gray hair he had left. "Amazing," he thought as he flew down I-94, pushing the pedal even more. Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a state trooper behind him, lights flashing and siren blaring. He floored it


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A senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette...

...convertible out of the dealership. Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little gray hair he had left. "Amazing," he thought as he flew down I-94, pushing the pedal even more. Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a state trooper behind him, lights flashing and siren blaring. He floored it to 100 mp...h, then 110, then 120. Suddenl


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The senior citizen and the state trooper.

A senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership. Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little gray hair he had left. "Amazing," he thought as he flew down I-94, pushing the pedal even more. Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a state trooper behind him, lights flashing and siren blaring. He floored it


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The Old man and the Corvette (xpost from rfunny)

A senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership. Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little gray hair he had left. "Amazing," he thought as he flew down I-94, pushing the pedal even more. Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a state trooper behind him, lights flashing and siren blaring. He floored it


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The Old man and the Corvette

A senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the
dealership. Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph,
enjoying the wind blowing through what little gray hair he had left.
"Amazing," he thought as he flew down I-94, pushing the pedal even
more. Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a state trooper behind
him, lights flashing an


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