Enthusiastically

Jokes

What was the short guy enthusiastically shouting when they were picking teams in gym class

pygmy pygmy

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A New York attorney representing a wealthy art collector called his client

He says,

"John, I have some good news and some bad news."

The art collector replied, "I've had an awful day; let's hear the good news first."

The attorney said, "Well, I met with your wife today, and she informed me that she invested $5,000 in two pictures that she thinks will bring a minimum of $15-20 million. I think she c


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NSFW a white guy is showering at the gym alone when in comes the biggest and most muscle bound black guy he has ever seen walks in...

The black man whips off his towel and reveals the largest member on a dude the white guy has ever seen. He can’t stop staring and it makes the black man uncomfortable after a few minutes

“You got a problem?” the muscles dude says

“I have to be honest” starts the white guy, “that thing is enormous. I don’t understand.. were you


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Boy gets cursed

So this boy gets cursed by only being able to say a 1 word per year

So he has this massive crush in his school for 5 years

One day he goes up to her very nervously after classes and enthusiastically but still nervously says says:

I love you very much!

The girl gets her hair off her ears, gets out her airpods and asks if he can repeat that again.


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The little girl enthusiastically runs to her father exclaiming "Daddy!" Her mother then brutally slaps her and says:

Find your own, slut!

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A New York attorney representing a wealthy art collector called his client



and said to him, "Saul, I have some good news and I have some bad news."

The art collector replied, "I've had an awful day; let's hear the good news first."

The attorney said, "Well, I met with your wife today, and she informed me that she invested $5,000 in two pictures that she thinks will bring a minimum


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Next time it will be you!

Since he was a child, at every wedding they met, aunt Bertha pinched Joe's cheeks an said merrily "Next time it will be you!". She only realized how obnoxious her behaviour was when Joe pinched her cheeks one day, and said enthusiastically: "Next time it will be you!", wile they sat at uncle Bob's funeral.


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On a scale of 1-10 how enthusiastically did Mitsubishi observe Pearl Harbor day?

Zero

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A great weekend

Friday, the husband enthusiastically turns to his wife and proposes:

*Honey, do you want to have a wonderful and awesome weekend?*

She immediately answers:

*Of course my love!!!*

Great, see you next Monday, bye!

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A Dad's Advice to His Son

A dad asked his 8 year\-old son what he wants to be when he grows up. The son enthusiastically said, "I want to be a priest!" To which the concerned dad replied, "Son, you don't want to be a priest..." The son said, "Why not, Dad?" Then the dad said, "Because every time you take a piss, you'll cry while saying, "Lord, is this all I could do with m


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In the middle of math class...

The teacher was enthusiastically describing the Quadratic equations, claiming it would be everyone's favorite thing in math because of its usefulness.
Eventually he came to the point of the class where he stepped the students through an example problem. He set up the problem and said, "Now, we need to use your new favorite thing to solve this problem. And everyone's favorite t


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Logic can be tricky.

Steve and Jack were sick of their jobs and decided to return to school to further their education. Steve went to a career adviser to get some ideas on what classes to take. Among the available courses Logic caught his attention.
"What does this class teach you" he asked the adviser.
"Basic logic skill" Steve still looked puzzled so the adviser explained, "I�


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Trump returns home after ten days of election campaigning to find his house in disarray. Pants, shoes, socks, jackets, shirts and underwear are strewn from one end of the place to the other.

As he follows the trail of garments towards the bedroom, he starts to hear the unmistakable sounds of his wife and a stranger in the throes of passion.

Trump races to the door, kicks it open, and stares dumbfounded at the sight of his wife enthusiastically humping the man he despises most in the world.

"What the fuck is going on here?" says Trump.


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A woman on the way to her new job

A woman is in her car on the way to her new job at a mental hospital, when the car begins juddering, and she is forced to pull over. She is looking at the engine when a man comes up behind her and says "it's your fan belt, love", before he leans in, and has the car fixed withing seconds. "My god! Thank you so much, do you need a lift anywhere, I must repay you somehow." Th


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A cashier was serving a pregnant lady

And enthusiastically asked

"Wow! Your child is so large already! Is it a boy or a girl?"

"Yes"

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A man was shocked!

A man was shocked to see his beautiful divorced neighbor knocking on his door one Friday evening. "I'm so horny that I can't stand it," she said. "I want to go out, get drunk and get laid. Are you free tonight?" "Yes" he replied enthusiastically. "Wonderful," she said. "Would you watch my kids?"


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A priest went into the country to pay a visit to a 92 year old church member whom he had not seen for many years...

She welcomed him into her home. While she made tea, he looked around and saw a beautiful oak organ with a cut glass bowl sitting on top of it. The bowl was half filled with water and a condom was floating on top of it. Astonished and shocked, he quickly turned away. But after tea, curiosity got the best of him and he asked her about it.
"Oh, yes," she said enthusiastically. "W


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Bloke wakes his wife up at 5:00am on a gloomy winter morning.

"Come on love. You, me and the dog are going fishing". She looks out the window and said "Balls to that, it's pissing down!!". Husband looks at her and says "You can either come ...with me or give me a blow job". She considers this, looks at her comfortable bed and says, "alright, let's get it over with. Whip it out". She starts to gobble semi enth


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