Dreadful

Jokes

A family member told me that my sausage puns are dreadful

but I've told wurst.

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An old lady dies and goes to heaven. She's chatting with St. Peter at the pearly gates when all of a sudden she hears the most bloodcurdling screams.

"Don't worry about that," says St. Peter, "it's only someone having the holes put into her shoulder blades for wings."

The old lady looks a little uncomfortable but carries on with the conversation.

Ten minutes later, there are more loud and dreadful screams "Oh my God," says the old lady, "now what is happening?"


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An old lady dies and goes to heaven. Shes chatting with St. Peter at the pearly gates when all of a sudden she hears the most bloodcurdling screams.

"Don't worry about that," says St. Peter, "it's only someone having the holes put into her shoulder blades for wings."

The old lady looks a little uncomfortable but carries on with the conversation.

Ten minutes later, there are more loud and dreadful screams "Oh my God," says the old lady, "now what is happening?"


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I went to a Jamaican hairdresser once

It was dreadful

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An old lady dies and goes to heaven. She's chatting with St. Peter at the pearly gates when all of a sudden she hears the most bloodcurdling screams.

"Don't worry about that," says St. Peter, "it's only someone having the holes put into her shoulder blades for wings."

The old lady looks a little uncomfortable but carries on with the conversation.

Ten minutes later, there are more loud and dreadful screams "Oh my God," says the old lady, "now what is happening?"


read more
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An old lady dies and goes to heaven. She's chatting with St. Peter at the pearly gates when all of a sudden she hears the most bloodcurdling screams.

"Don't worry about that," says St. Peter, "it's only someone having the holes put into her shoulder blades for wings."

The old lady looks a little uncomfortable but carries on with the conversation.

Ten minutes later, there are more loud and dreadful screams "Oh my God," says the old lady, "now what is happening?"


read more
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The Golf Cheat

Wife: Why are you hanging around the house so much? You used to be out on the golf course 3 or 4 times a week!

Husband: I don't have anyone to play golf with.

W: Why don't you play with Bob, you always used to?

H: Bob? HA!! Would you play with someone who demands retakes of every poor tee shot, kicks your ball into the rough when he thinks you'


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An old lady dies and goes to heaven. She's chatting with St. Peter at the pearly gates when all of a sudden she hears the most bloodcurdling screams.

"Don't worry about that," says St. Peter, "it's only someone having the holes put into her shoulder blades for wings."

The old lady looks a little uncomfortable but carries on with the conversation.

Ten minutes later, there are more loud and dreadful screams "Oh my God," says the old lady, "now what is happening?"


read more
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The Kings English

I take it you already know Of tough and bough and cough and dough? Others may stumble, but not you, On hiccough, thorough, slough and through.

Beware of heard, a dreadful word, That looks like beard but sounds like bird.

And dead: It’s said like bed, not bead -- For goodness’ sake, don’t call it deed!

Watch out for meat and great and threat&


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There's nothing but shit on the TV every night! -moaned my Grandad.

The sanitation in his Nursing Home is dreadful...

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I went to a Rastafari's funeral last night

It was dreadful.

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This joke is like a Jamaican barbershop...

Dreadful

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Today I was given a box of Jamaican hair extensions....

It was dreadful

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Today I was given a box of Jamaican hair extensions....

It was dreadful

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I always hate going to my Rastafarian friends house

its dreadful

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The Kings English

I take it you already know Of tough and bough and cough and dough? Others may stumble, but not you, On hiccough, thorough, slough and through.
Beware of heard, a dreadful word, That looks like beard but sounds like bird.
And dead: It’s said like bed, not bead -- For goodness’ sake, don’t call it deed!
Watch out for meat and great and threat… They rhyme wi


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My dog kept me awake all night.

Dreadful diarrhoea.

Don't think I cooked him properly.

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911 was hard for us European folk.

I caught my foreskin on my zipper that day! It was dreadful, had me late for work. I'll certainly never forget the 9^th of November anytime soon.

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Did you hear about the shampoo shortage in Jamaica?

It was dreadful

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"Mildred, are you putting on weight?"

Lady of the House, "Mildred, are you putting on weight?"
Maid, "Well, to tell you the truth Madam, I am pregnant." Lady, "OH DEAR! How ever did you get your self in such condition?"
Maid, "Well Madam it started when I ordered a vibrator through the mail."
Lady, "Goodness! You didn't use that dreadful thing did you?


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The Salvation Army realized that it had never received a donation from the city's most successful lawyer...

So a volunteer paid the lawyer a visit in his lavish office.

The volunteer opened the meeting by saying, 'Our research shows that even though your annual income is over two million dollars, you don't give a penny to charity. Wouldn't you like to give something back to your community?

The lawyer thinks for a minute and says, 'First, did your resear


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Why dreadlocks are called that?

Because they're dreadful.

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A Jamaican went to the barber.

It was a dreadful experience.

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Ever hear about the shampoo shortage in Jamaica?

It was dreadful.

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Did you hear about the Bob Marley impersonator?

He's dreadful.

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