Wanna hear a diagonal joke?

Coming right up!

I told my girlfriend to stop taking annoyingly diagonal selfies,

She told me that they're a cute angle and to stop being obtuse.

The best part of being single is being able to sleep around...

You get to sleep all over your bed. Left, right, diagonal, or in the middle.

After being made bishop, a man is asked what his next move will be.

Diagonal.

After the man was named bishop by the church, what was his next move?

Diagonal