Creepy

Jokes

A child and a paedophile walk into a creepy, secluded forest.

The child says to the man “I’m scared”.
“You’re scared??? I have to walk back on my own!”

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A clown and another guy are walking through the forest at night.

The guy says to the clown "Man, this forest is really creepy at night". The clown says "No kidding, and I have to walk all the way back by myself."

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People are saying the trailer for the "CATS" movie is creepy...

...and they're right.

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What do you call creepy wind chimes?

Stranger Tings

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Why does the creepy math teacher have depression?

Instead of talking over his problems with a therapist, he likes to describe them with kids.

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A young man was walking his date home ...

when they passed by a graveyard. The dusk was settling in and as the shadows were creeping, she locked her arm in his. He turned and asked, "A bit eerie isn't it?"

"Yes, isn't it."

As his hand slides around her waist, he asks, "Getting creepy isn't it?"

She says, "Yes isn't it."

He gro


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So my mate was welding the other day

While grinding off his work to admire his craftsmanship, a piece of metal flew into his eye.

Score 1 for wearing safety glasses.

Anyway, he complained he couldn't see, so we packed him off down to the hospital.

After an X-ray and scan the doctor comes in and says "You have Creepy Teacher Syndrome"

"Creepy teacher Syndrome?&quo


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Have you heard the stories of the freaky potato that would visit children in their rooms at night?

Turns out it was actually creepy pasta.

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What's the similarity between Santa Claus and a creepy stalker

He sees you when you're sleeping, he knows when you're awake

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Guy asks me if you could have any superpower what would it be and why?

I said the British empire, because invisibility is creepy.

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My girlfriend is so ugly

When she jumped in the pool the creepy crawly jumped out and mowed the lawn

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Man this rorschach guy is really creepy

He keeps drawing pictures of my parents arguing

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If a flock of geese is a gaggle and a group of lions is a pride, what do you call a family of creepy retards?

The mafia.

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My gf said she was being spyed on by a creepy guy she dont know

I've started choosing better hiding spots.

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Part 1. "Jesus wants to be in you." A comfort saying in church... Part 2. "Ever since Jesus come into my life... Part 3. "Jesus touched me in a personal way..

Part 1. A reason for concern in a Mexico Penitentiary.

Part 2. ... my lawn has been well maintained."

Part 3. ..then Juan tried to touch me. It was creepy. I'll never go to that Tijuana bar again."

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You know whats scary?

That creepy psycho killer behind you

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Want to know another creepy coincidence?

Jack the Ripper, Vlad the Impaler, and Winnie the Pooh all share the same middle name. Stay safe, my friends!

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Why are forests so creepy?

Because the trees are all shady.

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Resurrecting my laptop from sleep mode.

Are you gonna turn on for me?

Inner me: dude that's creepy.

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Resurrecting my laptop from sleep mode.

Are you gonna turn on for me?

Inner me: dude that's creepy.

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I wish the schools I went to as a child would have had more zero tolerance policies.

Smaller ants aren't so creepy to me.

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I left a present for my crush today, and she had me arrested!

When her cat does it, it's adorable, but apparently it's "creepy" when I leave a dead bird on her doorstep.

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What do you call a pirate who ended his hip hop career with 10 counts of sexual assault?

Disgusting. You call him nothing but a disgusting, creepy pirate.

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Dance like no one's watching!

Just be careful of the creepy guy in the corner with the video camera who hasn't moved all night who wants the make you famous on YouTube.

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How come when a kid pretends to be an duke it is cute,

But when I try to be an eleven year old girl talking to eleven year old boys it is creepy

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A guy and a girl are walking through the woods when the girl says, boy, these woods sure are creepy!!

The guy replies.. “tell me about it, I gotta walk out of here alone!”

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A guy and a young girl are walking through the woods when the girl says boy, these woods sure are creepy!

The guy then says “Yeah tell me about it, I have to walk out of here alone!”

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A guy in a creepy van pulls up next to a little boy and reaches in a bag of candy and says, "Hey kid, if you get in my van, I'll give you a piece of candy."

And the boy says, "If you give me the whole bag, I'll suck your dick."

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"Barely legal".

Because "almost underage" sounds a bit creepy.

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Hey i'm in a prank war with my friend so here's my next move:

call his number and say random stuff to confuse him. don't be creepy though
1-630-956-3154

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All those phobias we have are because we're really afraid of death or injury

Except nuns. They're just creepy.

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What do you call a creepy manipulative groups place where boys pee out in the open?

Cultural.

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Geraldine went on a blind date with a really creepy guy

It was intimiDating

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What do Santa and my creepy neighbor Chad have in common?

They both see me when I’m sleeping

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What does Santa have in common with my creepy neighbor Joe?

They both see me when I’m sleeping

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What's the difference between French people and their breakfasts?

One's creepy and the other is a crepe.

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My moms' creepy uncle's ashes were spread across the beach because that's what he wanted...

So all the hot girls would lay on him...

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I was blessed with a 10 inch penis when I was 12 years old...

...I really hope that creepy-ass priest is still in jail.

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A clown and a small child are walking in the woods at night....

In the distance wolves and coyotes howl, owls hoot, and creepy noises surround the two. The child, frightened by noises of the woods, looks at the clown and says, "Mr. these woods are scary". The clown turns to the child and says "you think you're scared, I have to walk out of here alone."


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What do you call it when an incel threatens to kill himself when someone doesn't respond to his desperate and creepy messages?

Fake noose.

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Did you hear the urban legend about the creepy ghost that appears when you use artificial sweetener?

He's called Splendaman.

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What does a creepy pokemon do while you're in the shower?

Pikachu

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A middle-aged man and little boy are walking through the forest at night

The little boy turns to the man, and says

"Mister, this is creepy! I'm afraid!"

The man looks at him and laughs.

"You're afraid? I have to come back through here alone!"

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I miss the old days where you could just walk up to a kid on the playground and ask if they wanted to play..

Nowadays youre supposedly a creepy mid life crisis weirdo that stalks kids. What happend to this generation SMH...

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I got a buddy whos a serial killer.

He’s one of those that likes to kill folks and use their skin as clothes. Obviously a real creepy guy, but he’s also exhausting to be around. So, I stopped hanging out with him once he started to wear me out.

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A Pedophile and a kid are walking through the woods at night

The kid turns to the Pedo and says, "Gee mister, it sure is creepy in here". The pedo responds, "You're telling me! I have to walk out of here alone."

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What do you call a spooky plate of spaghetti?

A creepy pasta.

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A creepy old man tells a little girl: "I'll give you a candy if you put your hand in my pocket."

The little girl replies: "Can't I have the whole pack if you let me suck your dick ?"

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A creepy old man tells a little girl: "I'll give you a candy if you put your hand in my pocket."

The little girl replies: "Can't I have the whole pack if you let me suck your dick ?"

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A creepy old man tells a little girl: "I'll give you a candy if you put your hand in my pocket."

The little girl replies: "Can't I have the whole pack if you let me suck your dick ?"

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