Correlation

Jokes

Causation vs. Correlation

Me: I used to think correlation implied causation

Me: But then I took a statistics class and now I don't

Friend: Sounds like the class helped!

Me: Well, maybe

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TIL in a recent study interviewing the children of anti vax parents there was a correlation in what they wanted to be when they grew up.

“Alive.”

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TIL that a controversial study found strong positive correlation between intelligence and physical traits including genital size in men

You thought this was a different sub didn't you

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Is there a correlation between the size of a nose and the sense of smell?

Because I read somewhere that back in World War II people with big noses smelled gas much more often.

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A student is going through some hypotheticals about snakes to their biology teacher

student:"What if it bites me and it dies?"

Teacher:"that means you’re poisonous."

Student:"What if it bites itself and I die?"

Teacher:"It’s voodoo."

Student:"What if it bites me and someone else dies?"

Teacher:"That’s correlation, not causation."


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Short Guy: "There's actually very little correlation between height and penis size. Trust me, I would know."

"My childhood priest was super tall."

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People keep confusing correlation and causation

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I'm sure you're all aware of the correlation between a rise vaccines and autism ...

so isn't that conclusive evidence that autism causes vaccines?

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Im sure your all aware of the obvious correlation between vaccines and autism ...

[deleted]

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Every time I approach girls they inexplicably shoot away from me. Cant say definitively if I have the force but...

The correlation is strong with this one.

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What's the correlation between snoop dogg and snoopy?

[deleted]

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"Hell is other people" -Sarte

"I think we should see other people"
-My ex-girlfriend

I'm not exactly sure of the correlation between these two quotes yet, but I think it means I dated a demon.

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I used the think that correlation implied causation, but now I know that it doesn't.

I took a statistics class last year, and that might have helped, but I'm not so sure.

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Correlation and causation are used together often, so that must mean that the word "correlation" must cause people to use the word "causation"

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HaircutSex Correlation Jesus Joke

I got that I looked like Jesus a lot when I had longer hair. It's a shame because I got a haircut and have been getting nailed less than the messiah lately.

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The correlation between income and testicular fortitude

The sport of the urban poor is basketball.
That of the working class and maintenance professionals is bowling.
of management it's baseball.
For upper management it's tennis,
and for CEOs it's golf...
The higher you climb the rat race ladder, the smaller your balls are.

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What's the correlation between black mambas, black holes, black people, and the black plague?

They're all dangerous.

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