To whomever stole my copy of Microsoft Office

I will find you, you have my Word!!

Newlyweds wake up one morning on their honeymoon

and the man suggests: "Darling, why don’t you brew us some coffee?"

Wife looks confused: "But that's your task, honey."


“What? Why?”

"It’s all over the Bible, dearest."

"The Bible says nothing about who’s supposed to be brewing coffee!"

The wife grabs

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I just downloaded the new Bohemian Rhapsody film...

...but I think it’s a pirate copy filmed in a cinema, because I can see a little silhouetto of a man.

If you give someone a video copy of the bad news bears...

You are the bearer of the bad new bears.

To the person who stole my Microsoft Office copy

Whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office, I will hunt you down

You have my Word.

To the person who stole my copy of Microsoft Office

I will find you. You have my word

Theres a reason why China has so many fake items

And the reason is because the Chinese have mistaken ‘Copyright’ for ‘Copy Is Right’

Yesterday Reddit, Hulu and Xbox live was down

Must have been a boring day for the staff at BuzzFeed. They couldn't play Call of Duty and insult each other, watch cartoons or even copy and paste more stories for their website.

I noticed my friend had a copy of The Encyclopedia Britannica...

...I thought that explains a lot.

Four freshman partied too hard during a music festival and unable to make it back for their final exam the next day

As they drove back to the college, they tried to think of a good excuse. Finally, they agreed to the same story: a tire was blown in the middle of nowhere at mid night so they were stuck. They each sent the professor an email asking to retake the exam and gave the excuse. The understanding professor said it's fine and ask them to take it the next day, but for fairness they would have to take

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To whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office, I will find you...

You have my Word.

Why did someone copy the wheel-rolling competition?

Needless to say, it was a spin-off.

How many redditors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well technically they don’t actually screw in the light-bulbs, they only copy and paste them.

What do you call a dick pick when its printed out?

A hard copy

I promise

To the person that stole my copy of microsoft Office. I will find you.

​

You have my word

I promise

To the person that stole my copy of microsoft Office. I will find you.

​

You have my word

To the person who stole my authentic and original copy of Microsoft Office, I will find you and I will kill you

You have my word.

To whoever stole my copy of Microsoft office

I will find you, you have my word.

A Foreign man wishes to buy land.

\[Long\]

A Foreign man named "Paste" is looking to invest in a plot of land but is short 1/2 of the total cost.

The land he wants and feels is right for him is in the town of "Ugh" but unfortunately he lives in "Um".

He walks into the local Bank and talks to an employee with the name tag "Copy"
He

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Whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office, I will find you

You have my Word

Whoever stole my copy of Microsoft office, I will find you

You have my Word

To whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office, I will find you

You have my Word

Friend of mine offered to lend me his Bohemian Rhapsody DVD

Turned out it was a pirated copy. Was pretty average quality if I’m being honest, could only see a little silhouetto of a man

APPLICATION FOR EMPLOYMENT

I refer to the recent death of the Technical Manager at your company and hereby apply for the replacement of the deceased manager.

Each time I apply for a job, I get a reply that there is no vacancy but in this case I have caught you red-handed and you have no excuse because I even attended his funeral to be sure that he was truly dead and buried before applying.

Attached

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A proud new father sits down with his dad to have a drink.

"Well son, now that you have a son of your own its time I gave you something."

"Dad you dont mea-"

"Yes I do. You've earned it." Says the father as he passes a copy of '1001 Dad Jokes 5th Edition' to the son.

"Dad I dont know what to say...I'm honored."

"Hi honored," Replies th

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Dear whoever stole my disk copy of Microsoft Office.

I will find you, you have my word.

Rick, can I please get my copy of 'Up' back?

Rick Astley: No.

A friend asked me if I wanted to watch the new game of thrones or a cam copy of End Game so obviously I chose the better quality one

What happened on Got?

Copy this

Onions in a bag. Onions in a bag. Onions in a bag. Onions in a bag. Onions in a bag. Onions in a bag. Onions in a bag. Onions in a bag. Onions in a bag. Onions in a bag. Onions in a bag.

A Foreigner wants to borrow land

\[Long\]

A Foreign man named "Paste" is looking to invest in a plot of land but is short 1/2 of the total cost.


The land he wants and feels is right for him is in the town of "Ugh" but unfortunately he lives in "Um".

He walks into the local Bank and talks to an employee with the name tag "Copy"
He say

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Want to hear a reposted joke

never mind i dont know how to copy and paste

Want hear a reposted joke

never mind i dont know to copy paste

How do you clean a keyboard?

With copy paste

I got a copy of the Mueller Report and asked the supreme leader of North Korea and the head coach of the Kansas City Chiefs to read it to me.

It's so much better when it's Un-Reid-Acted.

A woman was told to send a facsimile copy of their childs medical records to a specialist when their child fell very ill.

She didn’t deliver, the child died, turns out she was anti-fax.

Notre dame joke. (Keep scrolling if you want)

Terrible what happened to the Notre Dame. And it had the only copy of trump's tax returns.

What are 3 fortnite players inside a van falling of the cliff?

A waste, because in the van you can fit 15


*Now you can copy the joke and change fortnite players to whatever you want*

A woman made a 20 copy at my library and paid with a quarter, but told me to keep the change.

"Nobody wants nickel back."

If you reuploaded an entire episode of Game of Thrones onto YouTube

would it be copy wight infringement?

A 60 year old millionaire is getting married

A 60 year old millionaire is getting married and throws a big wedding reception. His friends are quite jealous and in a quiet moment one of them asks him how did he land such a hot 23 year old beauty? “Simple,” grins the millionaire, “I faked my age." His friends are really amazed and ask him how much he said. "Well", he replied. "I said I was 87!" - NOT

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I got a call telling me my wife

I got a call telling me my wife’s been taken to the hospital. “Oh my Lord, how is she?!” I asked. “I’m sorry to say she’s critical,” said the nurse. “What the heck is she complaining about again?!” - NOTE: A lot of creative work went into our website. Do not copy text without adding a link back to us. Thank you.

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Hey can I copy your report like I copied your math paper?

No. And you should do you own work.

"Yeah and you should get a tutor cause I got a C"

Wait... You got a C? But I got a D.

A man walks into a chip shop and says, "Excuse me. Have you got a copy of War and Peace?"

The guy behind the counter replies, "Sir, this is a chip shop"
The man, whispering, responds, "Sorry. Have you got a copy of War and Peace?"

A patient went to a doctor

A doctor accidentally prescribes him a laxative instead of a coughing syrup. - Three days later the patient comes for a check-up and the doctor asks: “Well? Are you still coughing?” - The patient replies: “No. I’m afraid to.” - NOTE: A lot of creative work went into our website. Do not copy text without adding a link back to us. Thank you.

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I threw spaghetti, rotini, penne rigate, and farfalle on my scanner.

All I got was copy pasta

How many redditors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None they just copy and paste other people’s lightbulbs into the socket and get all the credit

Blockbuster

A man walks into blockbuster, has a look around and goes to the front desk.

"excuse me sir, can I have a copy of Batman forever?"

Clerk responds: "Sorry guy, I'm gonna need it back tomorrow night".

Copy-editing is a very stressful line of work

Every time one of us misses a period, we get really nervous.

To whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office

I will find you.

​

You have my Word.