Compromise

Jokes

At work, my colleagues have given me the nickname Mr. Compromise.

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Marriage is all about making compromises.

For example, my wife wanted to paint our house blue and I wanted to paint our house red.

So as a compromise, we decided to paint our house blue.

Edit: blue

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What do you call 5 black guys having sex?

A threesome!

Edit: for those who don’t get it think back to 3/5th compromise of 1787, also I thought of this myself in 8th grade after learning about the 3/5 compromise

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Spartan Compromise Time

[deleted]

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A guy from Apple promised me a pre-release of a new product if I sucked his cock this morning. As if I would compromise my values for such a materialistic item!

Sent from my iPhone XI

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How do you get an angry ghost to compromise?

Find a happy medium.

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A Democrat and a Republican are trying to change a light bulb...

They can't seem to agree on the type of bulb to replace it with. LED vs CFL, brightness, color temperature, smart features...

They each think that their way is the best way and neither can be convinced otherwise.

Eventually they realize that they are on the same team and have the same goal of getting light in the room. They both decide to compromise and work togethe


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I'm Catholic and my pregnant girlfriend is Muslim

We've decided to compromise and raise our child Jewish

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What do you call 5 black people having an orgy?

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A Threesome...

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(three-fifths compromise... History buffs better get this one)

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Did you hear the Russians have began funding and creating technology to compromise and undermine the USAs recent Central American initiatives?

They have created the ladder

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The Russians have began funding and creating technology to compromise and undermine the USs recent Central American initiatives

They have created the ladder

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People call me Mr Compromise

It wasn't my first choice of nickname.. but I can live with it

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Marriage is all about compromise

My wife wanted a cat. I didn’t want a cat. So we compromised and got a cat!

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Two blondes want to forge banknotes

Two blondes want to forge banknotes. They can't decide whether to forge $50 or $100 banknotes - they argue a little and then they settle to a compromise: to forge $60 banknotes. They want to first test it on their blonde neighbour: so one of them goes to the neighbour - after a while she returns, smiling: "Everything went well: I have two $30 banknotes."


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What do you call 5 black people having sex?

A three-some!






3/5 Compromise.

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I'm always conflicted because I don't want to talk to the cashier, but I feel bad about contributing to their job's impending obsolescence.

I compromise by making small talk with the self checkout robot.

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What do you call it when two psychics reach a compromise?

A happy medium!


No idea if I was the first to ever tell this joke, but I was damn proud of myself when I put it together as a kid xD

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I like listening to classic rock in the car and my wife likes listening to country music, so we compromise

and listen to country music.

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One should avoid marriage at any cost. Marriage is hard work. And compromise. And more work.

Even Hitler committed suicide 40 hours after marriage.

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There are ongoing negotions to replace Andrew Jackson with Harriet Tubman on the $20 bill.

I think they're going to compromise by putting her on a $12 bill.

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If you asled Rick Astley to lend you the movie up

If you asked rick astley to lend you the movie up and he gave it to you then he just gave you up. But if he didnt give it to you then did he just let you down. If he tried to come up with a compromise and gave you the movie moana then he just ran around and hurt you

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How are millenials and tightrope walkers alike?

Compromise their net and they will literally die.

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What is opposite of 'shut-down, father?' Bipartisan, rational compromise on government budget in people's interest?

[deleted]

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Man: How did you compromise with your wife?

Man: How did you compromise with your wife?
Husband: She came to me on her feet.
Man: and what she said?
Husband: i was down to bad and she said come out, i will not say you anything...

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A man and a fortune teller make a compromise and reach a happy medium.

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There are 10 types of people in the world

1: those who understand binary.

2: those who don't.

3: those who take advantage of the fact that this concept can be extended to any base counting system.

4: those who identify as unsorted when confronted with a list of types of people in the world.

5: those who make lists that include "other" as a compromise for the fourth type of


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The doc said my wife and I should compromise..

I told him I don't negotiate with terrorists.

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At the height of a political corruption trial...

...the prosecuting attorney attacked a witness. "Isn't it true," he bellowed, "that you accepted five thousand dollars to compromise this case?"

The witness stared out the window, as though he hadn't hear the question.

"Isn't it true that you accepted five thousand dollars to compromise this case?" the lawyer repeated loudly.


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How does a necrophiliac compromise, and live a normal life?

Find a handicapped partner. At least they're dead from the waist down.

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What do you call five black guys having sex?

A threesome

3/5ths compromise

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FOUND THE COMPROMISE!

Husband and wife come for consultation to psychologist.
Husband :
- We are always arguing. We have only one car and she wants me to drive her to work every day and then go to my office and she doesn`t want to get out of the house earlier and she wants to go to work by the car only , so I am always late.
Doctor :
- Try to find the compromise , for example , you drive her t


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Why can you never compromise with a veggie burger?

Because they'll never meat in the middle.

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60 of African American girls agree to giving me a blowjob

I guess you could call it a 3/5's compromise

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What was the black guys reaction to the 35ths compromise?

I can't even

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Why is it called the 35 compromise?

Because it is only 2/5 solution.

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What do you call a Psychic Compromise?

A Happy Medium.

Sorry, a played around with the wording of this a lot and couldn't find anything better. Please suggest a better phrasing.

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Why did the Republican get a sunburn?

Because the sunscreen instructed to apply liberally and he was unwilling to compromise.

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So a man and his fiance are planning their wedding...

and there is a few things that they arent agreeing on. But they are doing their best to compromise. Suddenly the man says to his fiance,

"Its a shame we dont live in the middle east!"
"Why is that?" asks his fiance.
"Because then you wouldnt have a say!"

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