So I was on the toilet for so long my movement became a fully fledged composition
What do Beethoven's Ninth Symphony and the hitchhiker in my car have in common?
They are both in an advanced state of D composition.
What can you say about chemistry that you cant say about your girlfriend?
“Hey babe, you’re a scientific discipline involved with elements and compounds composed of atoms, molecules and ions: their composition, structure, properties, behavior and the changes they undergo during a reaction with other substances.”
A child writes a little essay in his composition class, This morning my cat had seven kittens and they are all socialists.
The same child, a week later, writes, “Now all seven of my kittens are capitalists.” The teacher replies that just last week the boy had written that his kittens were socialists. “They were,” said the boy, “but now their eyes have opened.”
What is the chemical composition of banana?
J.S. Bach fathered many children and music pieces.
Choir Member: I read that Johan Sebastian Bach had 20 children and wrote a new musical pipe organ composition almost everyday of his adult life.
Organist: Yeah, he really knew how to use his organs.
Teacher: "Your composition on the assignment "My dog" is exactly like your brothers...
...did you copy it?"
Boy: "No, it's the same dog!"
Teatcher: "Your composition on the assignment "My dog" is exactly like your brothers...
Jimmy, your composition "My Dog" is the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?
No, sir. It's the same dog.
Asked to write a composition entitled, "What I'm thankful for on Thanksgiving," little Timothy wrote, "I am thankful that I'm not a turkey."
What does the Terminator do in his spare time?
He writes music composition. You know because when he time travels he tells everyone "I'll be Bach".
A mean English teacher asks his students to write a composition.
The composition has to include the following topics: religion, sex, monarchy, and mystery. You have 30 minutes.
After 20 seconds, Johnny puts his paper on the teacher's desk and leaves. The teacher picks up the paper and reads:
"My God, someone fucked the queen, who was it?"
I hate when my bank account is like a musical composition by Bach
Just wrote a musical composition about pedophiles...
"Dick" in A minor
"Children," said the teacher, instructing the class in composition, "you should not attempt any flights of fancy; simply be yourselves and write what is in you. Do not imitate any other person's writings or draw inspiration from outside sources."
As a result of this advice Tommy Wise turned out the following composition: "We should not attempt any flights
Asked to write a composition entitled, "What I'm thankful for on Thanksgiving," little Timothy wrote, "I am thankful that I'm not a turkey.
One music university senior complains to another:
"Dude, I have no idea how to write my graduation composition. Do you have any hint?"
"Why don't you try coping professor X's piece he wrote when getting his D.A.?"
"I did. It turned out to be Beethoven's Fifth Symphony."
What is the chemical composition of a fire hydrant?
Little John in 1-minute Composition
The teacher asked the class to write a composition that involved at the same time sex, royalty, and religion.
Not even two minutes had passed when Little John handed in his.
The arm of the teacher still raised to stop him, but she stopped the gesture as she read what he wrote:
And the queen said: Oh, my God, so good!
Chemists in a pub
After a long day, two chemists, Bill and Bob, go to a pub to unwind. Bob says to the barkeeper, "I'll just have a glass of H^2 0." Bill chimes in, "I'll have a glass of water too". They take a seat as he asks Bob, "Why did you refer to water with its chemical composition?" Bob did not answer, fuming that his assassination attempt had failed.