Carrier
Jokes
How do you get pikachu onto a bus
In a pet carrier.
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During WWI, whenever they captured a carrier bird they labeled them POWs
Pigeon of war
0UPVOTEDOWNVOTEWhat is Gokus cellular carrier of choice?
SaiyanT&T
0UPVOTEDOWNVOTEA wise man told me that the mobile network carrier you choose says a lot about your life
No wonder I use Virgin Mobile.
0UPVOTEDOWNVOTEIf people design such a Shipborne aircraft to replace the existing Shipborne aircraft, then the existing aircraft carriers can be eliminated, can't they? So, do you think people in the past had brain disabilities? Ha-ha!
Design the carrier aircraft as buoy type water plane! Add one or two buoys at the front end of the aircraft. Add one or two buoys at the rear end of the aircraft! Add an airbag to each of the two wings of the aircraft! In addition, in order to add airbags to the wing, the delta wing may have to be changed to a four-corner wing!
When the aircraft begins to take off, let the buoy at the
0UPVOTEDOWNVOTEWhat did the armored personnel carrier (APC) driver say to the attendant at the gas station?
Fill 'er up, full tank.
0UPVOTEDOWNVOTEDo you think back in the day people would write each other jokes by carrier pigeons?
Like would they get them or would it just fly over their heads?
0UPVOTEDOWNVOTEIf two Hawaiians are having a conversation on the U.S.S. Nimitz...
... do they speak carrier pidgin?
0UPVOTEDOWNVOTEWorld travelers have voted Singapore Airlines thir best carrier in the world.
And the worst carrier? Bill Cosby's private jet.
0UPVOTEDOWNVOTEA passenger walks up to check in for a small regional carrier.
The agent says, "Mr. Smith, you're the only passenger, so we give you the option: Would you like an older, more experienced pilot, or a younger one with quicker reflexes?"
0UPVOTEDOWNVOTEHow do you get an elephant in a Safeway carrier bag?
You take the "F" out of "way"
(It took me a while, so don't feel bad, try not to spoil it!)
0UPVOTEDOWNVOTENegligence
Working at the post office, I’m used to dealing with a moody public. So when one irate customer stormed my desk, I responded in my calmest voice, “What’s the trouble?”
“I went out this morning,” she began, “and when I came home, I found a card saying the mailman tried to deliver a package but no one was home. I’ll have you know, my husba
0UPVOTEDOWNVOTELittle boy and horse sht
A little boy was sitting by the pile of horse shit and was making some sort of little sculptures when a fireman stoped by and asked the boy what he was doing. The boy said "I'm making a shitty fireman like you" and runs away. The next day again, same story but this time the mail carrier stoped and asked the boy what he was doing. The boy said " I'm making a shitty mail car
0UPVOTEDOWNVOTEIf two Hawaiians have a conversation on the USS Nimitz
… do they speak carrier pidgin?
0UPVOTEDOWNVOTEYo mama's so fat...
Everytime she enters a room everyone says "Carrier has arrived".
0UPVOTEDOWNVOTEWhat do you call a pregnant man who's also a postal worker?
A male carrier
0UPVOTEDOWNVOTEDid you hear about the drinking straw that had ten jobs?
It was a doctor, a lawyer, a carpenter, an artist, a janitor, a football player, a dentist, a cashier, a mail carrier, and a receptionist. Most drinking straws couldn't handle so many jobs, but this one was flexible.
0UPVOTEDOWNVOTECuriosity has killed my cat....
At least I think it did. I mistook Schrodinger's box for my cat carrier when I threw the squeaky-catnip-mouse toy in...
0UPVOTEDOWNVOTEWhat cell carrier do Mormons use?
Virgin Mobile
0UPVOTEDOWNVOTEGame of Sea Chicken
While traversing the dark ocean at night, the captain of a Navy aircraft carrier sees a light straight ahead on a collision course with his ship. Not able to reach anyone by radio, he sends a Morse code message with his lights:
"Warning! Change your course by 12 degrees west."
After a short pause, the light signals back, "No. Change your course by 12 degree
0UPVOTEDOWNVOTEYou Get What You Pay For
A woman went out to her yard one morning and found her dog just laying there, not moving at all. She thought it might be dead, but since it was a basset hound and never moved much anyway, she wanted to be sure... after all, she didn't want to bury it and then find out it wasn't dead. So she took it to the vet.
The vet agreed to take a look. He shook the dog gently. He checked for
0UPVOTEDOWNVOTEGot bad news today. Doctor says I have Nimitz Disease.
But don't worry. I'm just a carrier.
0UPVOTEDOWNVOTEI don't have a problem with 5p carrier bags, I have a bag for life, ever since I got married last year.
^^
0UPVOTEDOWNVOTEJust found a carrier bag with an England rugby shirt in the rubbish bin,
can't believe someone would throw that away! Worth 5p that!
0UPVOTEDOWNVOTEFlagging down a people-carrier taxi is like my music collection.
I don't like van hailing.
0UPVOTEDOWNVOTENew Chinese Aircraft Carriers
A article on a defense blog discusses in length "China planning three aircraft carriers and eventual path to nuclear carriers that will copy US super carrier tech."
Most of the commenters wrote about world war three, imminent conflict, increase spending, or Obama.
One guy wrote: I doubt the Chinese pilots can land on a moving aircraft carrier. They can't e
0UPVOTEDOWNVOTEWhat's the US Navy's biggest and longest serving aircraft carrier?
The USS Great Britain.
0UPVOTEDOWNVOTEWhats yellow and blue and has a tight ass at one end?
A Lidl's carrier bag.
0UPVOTEDOWNVOTEHow to you tell a naval officer from and RAF officer on an aircraft carrier?
The naval officer is trying to feed bread to the helicopters!
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