Bummer

Jokes

An Australian was taking his girlfriend out for a night of passion under the stars.....

....when she was stung between the legs by a giant hornet. In a panic he wasn’t sure what to do so he rang the Australian Emergency Medical Helpline.... “Hello, I’m takin’ me Shiela out for a romantic night of camping and she’s just been stung by a hornet on her privates...and it’s all swollen and closed up”... “Ahhh bummer mate”, the helpline


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Last night, a big storm put a dent in 16.67 of my hummer.

bummer

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The Elephant: Did Noah sent you a friend request on Facebook?

The Dinosaur: No, he didn't.

The Elephant: Bummer...

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My wife and I went on our honeymoon to Australia, but unfortunately, I had to dial the help line. "G'day this is Tim, you've reached the Aussie help line. How can we help ya?"

I told him, "We were in the ocean and my wife was stung by a jellyfish on her lady parts. Her vagina is completely swollen shut. It's our honeymoon, and well....ya know."

The guy on the help line replies, "Ah, bummer mate!"

I say, "I hadn't thought of that! Thanks for the advice. You've saved my honeymoon!"


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What do you call an ex-islamic extremist?

...

*A muslim bummer.*

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I once met a gay Muslim and hooked up with him

Halfway through he suddenly blew up.
How the hell was I supposed to know he was a suicide bummer?

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What do you call a homosexual terrorist?

A suicide bummer.

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My wife and I went on our honeymoon to Australia...


Unfortunately, I had to dial the help line.

"G'day this is Tim, you've reached the Aussie help line. How can we help ya mate?"

I told him, "We were in the ocean and my wife was stung by a jellyfish on her lady parts. Her vagina is completely swollen shut. It's our honeymoon, and well....you know."

The guy on the help


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Such a shame to hear about dale winton

A real bummer really.

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Australian Couple on Honeymoon.

An Australian couple, Steve and Shelia were on the first night of their Honeymoon when Shelia slipped and split her Pussy, Steve didn't know what to do, so he called his best mate Bruce and explained what had happened, Bruce replied "Bummer Mate" Steve said I didn't think of that, cheers Bruce I owe you a Beer.


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What do you call a sad gay Brit?

Aaa bloody bummer

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Whats blue and pretty on top, and brown and kind of a bummer in the bottom?

The Mediterranean Sea.

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What do you call a blowjob from a homeless person ?

A Bummer

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The ending to Kingsman is a bit of a bummer

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Honeymoon in Australia

My wife and I went on our honyemoon to Australia. Unfortunately, I had to dial the help line. "G'day this is Tim, you've reached the Aussie help line. How can we help ya?" I told him, "We were in the ocean and my wife was stung by a jellyfish on her lady parts. Her vagina is completely swollen shut. It's our honeymoon, and well....ya know." The guy on the help li


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My gay brother has recently been diagnosed with HIV

What a bummer.

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Australian helpline...

Helpline Agent: "G'day mate, Aussie help line ere, what's the problem cobber?

Guy: "I'm in Darwin with my Sheila and she's been stung on the minge by a wasp, and now her pussy has completely closed up"

Helpline Agent: "Ah bummer mate!"

Guy: "Cheers mate, I hadn't thought of that, bye!"


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I visited a proctologist the other day...

It was a real bummer.

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Looking for an Australian joke!

I saw it yesterday. I only remember the last line was "bummer man".

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My friend just told me he has a chocolate lab.

Turns out it's a dog, not a place. Bummer.

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