Breathless

Jokes

A penguin runs into a bar...

Breathless with panic he catches the barman’s attention and says- “ excuse me sir but my brothers went missing, have you seen him?” To which the barman replies “what does he look like?”

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My wife called me on the phone, breathless, and said, Where are you? I said, Im at the pub.

She said, “I think the baby is coming”

Me: I don’t think he can get in. He will be underage.

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The amount of Valentine's day cards I got this year has left me breathless.

Turns out the card shop has a security guard and he gives a good chase.

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My heart was broken and it was breathless

I think I'm having a heart attack

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I was once abducted

The aleins even showed me outside the ship, i was breathless

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An old couple, mostly naked in bed, commenting after their intense moments:

Him : my love !What an evening tonight ! I can say I let you breathless !!!




Her : yes my darling, that third fart ! It really suffocated me.

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Cardi B is attractive but

Her sister Cardi O left me breathless

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Cardi B is attractive but...

her sister Cardi O left me breathless.

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I just replaced the 'n' with a 'm'.

Dr. Asthana became breathless.

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What do you call a breathless man in a theatre?

[deleted]

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I named my Penis asthma

because it leaves bitches breathless.

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My wife phoned me, panting and breathless.

"Where are you?" she moaned.

"I'm at the pub." I replied.

She said, "I think the baby's coming!"

I said, "Well, he won't get in. He's underage."

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My wife phoned me, panting and breathless.

"Where are you?" she moaned.

"I'm at the pub." I replied.

She said, "I think the baby's coming!"

I said, "She won't get in, she's under-age."

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Two friends are out hunting in the woods...

...suddenly one of them clutches his heart, gasps and keels over. His friend, panicked, calls 911 on his cell phone.
The operator answers; "sir, what's the nature of your emergency?"
"Oh my God, my buddy just collapsed, I think he's dead! What do I do??" the hunter asks.
"Alright sir," She says, "Just calm down. First, make sure he


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Just got 15 Valentines cards! It's left me completely breathless...

The security guard in Clintons Cards gave me quite a chase

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