Biology

Jokes

Little Johnny

Little Johnny was in his biology class and his biology teacher issued an oral test asking, "what are the muscle's attached to the legs of humans?" johnny raised his hands to give his answer "dad told me of a growing pain he had when he had a muscle pull and then I saw mom massaging it to soothe his pain" the teacher then asked "What muscle is that? with a confused l


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Why dont the biology and physics teacher get together?

Because they have no chemistry

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A frog goes to a fortune teller.

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Why did the gay kids drop out of high school?

Failing Biology

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Everyday biology pun

What do you get when you mix picture day with writing a biology essay?

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photos-and-thesis

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What do you call a gay in high school?

Potential Biology dropout and bullied

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Biology makes me feel alive.

Get it? Got it? Good.

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What is the study of people attracted to both sexes?

Biology

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I got kicked out of biology class today for eating during the lesson...

Apparently it's called an "Eye disection" not "Eye digestion"

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I made a DNA joke in my biology class but no one laughed.

Guess my thymine was off.

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A biology professor is doing a demonstration for his class.

He takes a frog and cuts one leg off. He tells to the frog, "jump frog, jump!" The frog proceeds to jump. He cuts two more of the legs off and the frog is still able to jump both times, even having only one leg left. He then cuts the last leg off and tells the frog to jump. The frog, quite obviously, doesn't jump. The professor then turns to the class and tells them "See? A fro


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Failed my Biology Test today....

They asked, "What is commonly found in cells?" Apparently "black people" wasn't the correct answer.

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Failed my biology test test....

They asked, "What is commonly found in cells?" Apparently "black people" wasn't the correct answer.

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A frog goes to a fortune teller to get his palm read.

He asks her, "so, what's my fortune?"

The fortune teller says to him, " I have good news and I have bad news.

The good news is that soon, you will meet a beautiful young girl who will find great interest in you, and she is going to steal your heart."

"That's great! What's the bad news?" the frog asks.


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Why do biology majors make good suicide counselors?

They are way more interested in living things than dead ones.

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What's the worst part of a dyslexic officer's work at a college biology department?

The flies.

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The Biology Exam.



Students in an advanced Biology class were taking their mid-term exam. The last question was, 'Name seven advantages of Mother's Milk'.

The question was worth 70 points or none at all. One student, in particular, was hard put to think of seven advantages.

However, he wrote:

1) It is perfect formula for the child.
2) It prov


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Why did the physics teacher break up with the biology teacher?

There was no chemistry

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A friend in biology class asked, "are geckos lizards?"

I told him, "We're in a frekin' bio class, you should have gotten it in the gecko"

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Im failing Marine Biology but I think I should still pass.

My grade is below C level.

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A young boy walks in on his parents showering together

Looks at his mom, and not yet being versed in biology exclaims "WHAT is THAT?" His father calmly explains, "Well son, that's where God hit her with his ax." To which the boy replies, "HOLY SHIT, he hit'er right in the cunt!"

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Why did the biology teacher and rhe physics teacher break up?

Because they had no CHEMISTRY.

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A biology student kidnapped and murdered a woman

He got away with it, and now spends a semester studying a broad.

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A doctor who was proud of his degrees...

always had them hanging in his office. His BS in Biology, PhD in Biology, and his MD were framed and hung behind him.

One day, however, his clinic caught fire and he was trapped inside. They were finally able to pull his unconscious body from the building as its frame collapsed and it came crashing down to the ground amidst smoke and rubble.

He came to as they got him t


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A hot student was getting bad grades in science.

His teacher agreed to give her good grades based on his performance in the bedroom.

They go to the teachers house the next week and have a night of passion.

The student completely flunked the tests but got good grades in chemistry and physics.

He asks why those two and not biology as well.

"Well, the chemistry was definitely there and you


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What do you call it when your Biology grade is close to an F?

Biodegraded

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Nsfw When you failed biology so bad you think there is more than 2 genders

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A frog telephones the Psychic Hotline.

His Personal Psychic Advisor tells him, “You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you.”

The frog is thrilled! “This is great! Will I meet her at a party?”

“No,” says his advisor, “in her biology class.”

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So, today in biology I learnt about speciation (Where populations that are separated eventually become so genetically varied that interbreeding cannot occur and a new species is created)

If trump builds the wall, Mexicans will become a separate species

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Why do LGBT students drop out of high school?

Failing basic biology.

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A frog telephones the Psychic Hotline.

His Personal Psychic Advisor tells him, “You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you.”

The frog is thrilled! “This is great! Will I meet her at a party?”

“No,” says his advisor, “in her biology class.”

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How did the frogs feel about being used in the biology lab?

They were pithed.

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So,why did the physics teacher break up with the biology teacher?

There was no chemistry!IMAO

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My dad told me this a couple of days back: Three professors walk into a seaside bar.

The first, a maths professor, wishes to make a name for himself and says to the other two, "I'm gonna figure out the depth of the sea."

Saying that, he walks out. The physics professor, unwilling to be outshined, proclaims "Well I'll find out what the density of the sea actually is and catch that maths professor in his own game."

Huffing and


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What did the prostitute biology teacher say?

Sex cells.

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I failed a biology test the other day. The question was: What is commonly found in cells?

Apparently "black people" wasn't the answer.

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I told my Biology lab partner to let me be her DNA helicase...

So I can unzip those genes.

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I told my biology lab partner to let me be her DNA helicase...

So I can unzip those jeans.

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Is biology the study of living organisms...

Or just two ology's..

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Why did the physics teacher break up with the biology teacher

Why did the physics teacher break up with the biology teacher? There was no chemistry

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Marine biology

I was going to study marine biology dude. Turns out it was just a lot of maths.
Really dude? What course?
Algae brah.

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In Biology, I learned Mitochondria was the powerhouse of the cell

In Prison, I learned Bubba was the powerhouse of the cell

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Say what you want about paedophiles

But at least they expose kids to early biology lessons.

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My biology teacher stubbed his toe today and screamed..

Mitosis

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What do you call a transgender student who passed his or her Biology test?

A liar

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2 Muffins are in a oven

One of them says, it's hot in here,

The other one screams ahhh! talking muffin.


I know this is bad but my biology teacher said it and wanted to prove it was a bad joke.

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Biology vs Sex Education

A teacher asked her 4th grade students - What part of the human body can grow up to 4x from it's original size.
Little Suzy said, you shouldn't discuss things like that we are too young.
Teacher asks the same question and Suzy said, I will report you to the principal and you will get fired we shouldn't be having this type of discussion.
Teacher ask the same questio


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Why did the Physics teacher and Biology teacher break up?

The biology teacher was abusive.

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Reed Richards posses a mastery of mechanical, aerospace, electrical engineering, chemistry and biology

But we all know why he's called Mr. Fantastick.

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Why does Physics hate Biology?

Because they have no Chemistry

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