Avoid

Jokes

How did the man who threw his mints in the garbage avoid jail time?

It was ruled he had non-compost-mentos

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Why do people avoid having sex with gossip queens?

They've got loose lips.

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Traffic lights teach us that if you see a green man, you should start crossing the road.

So that's how I avoid environmentalists.

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My wife asked me to play the snog Marry and avoid game.

So I told her I snogged married and avoid you my love. I WIN!!!

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Ive started deliberately getting hard before taking a leak. It helps me avoid getting any on the seat or floor.

You could say I please to aim

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What do vegans and introverts have in common?

Both avoid meet.

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I got a call from the hospital. "Sir, your wife has broken her arm in four places."

So I replied, "Well, I guess she better avoid those places."

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I'm scared of elevators.

So I'm taking steps to avoid them.

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How to avoid your girlfriend?

Give her my phone number.

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What room do ghosts avoid?

The living room.

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Did you hear about the mathematician whos afraid of negative numbers?

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Joke

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You know how to avoid click bait?

Obviously not.

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Do you know how to avoid clickbait?



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Did you hear about the mathematician thats afraid of numbers?

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Heres how you avoid clickbait. 5 will SHOCK you

Obviously do the opposite of what you just did

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I don't like elevators

So I'm gonna start taking steps to avoid them.

^this ^joke ^is ^courtesy ^of ^Christopher ^Judge ^AKA ^Dad ^of ^War

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My maths professor has a phobia of negative numbers

He will stop at nothing to avoid them

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Did you hear about the mathematician who was afraid of negative numbers?

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I decided to avoid danger by shopping online instead of crowded malls...

But I was shot by a crazed Amazon Prime driver.

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I really hate elevators

I'm going to take steps to avoid them.

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I am a social vegan

I avoid meet

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I'm a social vegan

I avoid meet

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I'm a social vegan..

I avoid meet.

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Why do sumo wrestlers shave their legs?

To avoid being mistaken for feminists.

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Have you hear about the mathematician who was afraid of negative numbers?

He'd stop at nothing to avoid them

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Did you hear about the mathematician who was afraid of negative numbers?


He'd stop at nothing to avoid them.

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Did you hear about the mathematician who was afraid of negative numbers

He’ll stop at nothing to avoid them

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What did the mathematician say to the dirty negative numbers?

I'll stop at nothing to avoid you!

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What type of drink do insects avoid?

Fly's water.

*(fly-swatter)*

​

It's bad, but I just thought of it while reaching for my fly-swatter...

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I just printed some pamphlets on how not to say the wrong thing and avoid getting into fights.

Who wants some?

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Why do public servants avoid looking out the window before lunchtime?

So they'll have something to do in the afternoon.

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Ive recently had a fear of elevators

I’ve been taking steps to avoid them

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Did you hear about the math teacher whos afraid of negative numbers?

He will stop at nothing to avoid them

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I have a crippling fear of elevators

So I've been taking steps to avoid them

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Why can't the sun avoid a fight at dusk?

[deleted]

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I once was so low on gas

I ran out swerving to avoid you mama.

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Yo Mama so fat

I swerved to avoid her in the road and ran out of gas

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Cancelled

The seminar “How To Avoid Frauds” is cancelled.

Tickets are non-refundable.

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Women are short of stature, so as to avoid seeming predatory.

Men are predatory of stature, so as to avoid seeming short.

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A new study shows that 80 of people can't avoid click bait and this one thing will reveal if you are one of them.

You are not.

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According to a new, study only 10 of people with this trait can avoid clickbait!

It's irrelevant because you are in the 90%

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Avoid dangerous cults.

Practice safe sects.

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Why did the safety manager avoid the pile of LSD in the middle of the floor?

He felt it was a tripping hazard.

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I would really avoid that sushi the ninja just tampered with.

It just seems too fishy.

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People are two types,

avoid both of them.

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People tend to avoid me, since I have schizophrenia...

But at least I have each other.

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90 of people can't avoid clickbait for this one reason.

Apparently you are in the 90%

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How to avoid clickbait ?

Not like this

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I have a fear of elevators...

but I'm taking steps to avoid it!

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