What do you get when you break the world record for not moving for the longest amount of time?
A certificate and atrophy.
The Last Dad Joke
This was the last joke (wise crack) my father made before he died...
(Background) My father was diagnosed with ALS (Lou Gehrig's Disease) in his late 50's. Watching him deteriorate was painful for me, but he always kept his sense of humor. As he was nearing the end of his life, he was confined to a wheelchair with a brace to hold his head up, and had a feeding tube. He co
Why did the rich man try to pick up girls in the anorexia ward?
He wanted atrophy wife.
Who says sitting at home watching TV all day can't be rewarding?
In fact, I just got atrophy from it!
What did the man who won a contest where he sat still for 72 hours get?
The rheumatologist turned chef hands you your plate
And she says
Did you hear about the kid who won the ALS competition?
He won atrophy for first place.
What kind of award do you get for being really lazy?
A man who breaks the world record for longest survived coma is rewarded with
...it isn't as rewarding as it sounds
Sometimes when you over-exert yourself to win the game
You are rewarded with atrophy.
I never participated in sports...
But I still got atrophy
What do you get for winning the "Staying in Bed the Longest" competition?
What award did the kid in a coma for six weeks win?
What prize did the dead body receive?
I think I won atrophy of the Brain.
Can't remember why.
What did the winner of the not moving contest get?
I chained up my trophy wife in the basement...
She's atrophy wife now.
What did the man get for winning the muscle relaxing contest?
I participated in a laziness competition...
I won atrophy.
My friend and I are having an eating contest.
Whoever can eat the least gets atrophy.
Did you hear about Nursing Home Sports League
Everyone gets atrophy at the end of the season.
I expected a medal for my bravery when I had a full-leg cast on.
Instead, I got atrophy.
I entered a laziness competition and placed first.
I got atrophy.
What did the winner of the weak muscles competition get?
Did you hear about the 4th place winner with the muscle condition?
Even though he didn't rank in the top three he still got atrophy.
What did the laziest man in the world win?
What do you get when you win the laziest man in the world contest?