Area

Jokes

I hate all these lightning storms in my area...

Oh well, you get Zeus to it

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Why did the pirate store their loot in an arid area?

Because desert tends to make the booty larger.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

There's a guy in our area stealing the wheels off police cars....

The cops are tirelessly working to find a suspect.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

How do you call an area populated by run-down Italian beauty salons?

A spa-ghetto


... I am so ashamed of myself...

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

An annoying Redditor went to a tourist trap "panning for gold river" for vacation...

He paid the ridiculously high price for a pan and worked for over an hour only to come up with nothing. Wiping the sweat on his forehead with he back of his hand, he walked away from the water, defeated. As he was walking to the main area to return the pan, he bumped into an elderly man with work worn hands and sun-tanned skin. As they were both walking to the main area, they struck up a conversat


read more
UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Area 51 joke

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

I have an idea what the Area 51 raid could look like if it takes place during winter.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

I live on Attractive Roadkill Lane.

It's a pretty rundown area.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

A barber in my area got arrested for being a drug dealer.

I was his client for many years, and I had no clue that he was a barber.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Tupac said he fucked yo wife

Tupac told you to hit her up but you hit her down,so the aliens of area 51 ressurect Tupac,he suddenly gang rapes her with the area 51 agents .She moans and scream as she bleeds from her Pussy.Tupac 2 Km Dick penetrated her as she was moaning.Then 6ix9ine who turned into a Dolphin got murdered by Tupac bars.The agents fucked your wife until they died of sperm draining,Tupac was the only one left.T


read more
UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Tupac said he fucked yo wife

Tupac told you to hit her up but you hit her down,so the aliens of area 51 ressurect Tupac,he suddenly gang rapes her with the area 51 agents .She moans and scream as she bleeds from her Pussy.Tupac 2 Km Dick penetrated her as she was moaning.Then 6ix9ine who turned into a Dolphin got murdered by Tupac bars.The agents fucked your wife until they died of sperm draining,Tupac was the only one left.T


read more
UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

A Couple Was Browsing Around An Art Museum

suddenly, a portrait caught the wife's attention.

"Wow! What an ugly portrait of a gorilla!" the wife proclaimed loudly.

The husband nervously scanned around the area and whispered to his wife "Honey, you are looking at a mirror."

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

I'm not saying I'm poor, but nobody in my area has ever keyed my car.

Because otherwise their keys would depreciate in value.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Let us all observe a moment of silence for the Area 51 tragedy.

(Oh shit.....wrong year!)

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Instead of using Tinder or Bumble, go on Facebook Marketplace and search for wedding dresses for sale.

You will receive a list of recently divorced women in your immediate area, for free. Plus you can filter by size.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Tinder is for rookies

Go to Facebook Marketplace and search for wedding dresses. It'll show you recently divorced females in your area. From there you can filter by size.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Whats an aliens favorite font? (Area 51 Raid)

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

About the area 51 raid...

So, everyone is worried that people are going to go to the raid and die. But.my question is, can't we just BLJ ourselves to victory?

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Area 51

Is area 51's area 51?

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

I don't know who this 'WiFi' guy is...

But a lot of business in my area are petitioning for his freedom.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Does my alien girlfriend from area 51 have a Penis?

Something inside me says yes

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Tinder told me there are 50000 hot american singles in my area

This vacation in Iran's gonna duck

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Area 49 and Area 50 had a fight...

Area 51

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Want to know how ugly I am?

I'm so ugly I'm the reason why there are so many lesbians in my area.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

A lady with no arms and no legs...

...was lying in the sun by the pool.

A man walked into the pool area, and she called out to him: "Hey, come over here - I want you to fuck me."

He walked over, picked her up, threw her out into the pool, and said, "Okay - you're fucked."

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

If America is storming Area 51 the the Europeans can storm the Vatican

We take the aliens , you take the predators

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

A barber in my area got arrested for being a drug dealer.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

The funniest thing about the whole Area 51 attack

Is that someone somewhere had to explain to an alien why we think they're in Area 51.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

All these people posting about invading Area 51..

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Is your name Area Fifty-One?

Because I wanna storm your private areas

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

What will a guard of Area 51 do if he watches Blackpink's music video on his watch?

He will alert the area when he hears"BLACKPINK IN YOUR AREA!!!"

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

When I was an Uber driver in Wisconsin

Back when I was an Uber driver, I had a pick up in a rural area by Wisconsin. It's close to a road where car accidents were frequent and had a few deaths. Anyway, picked up this disheveled looking dude, Gary, and proceeded towards the destination. I'm pretty alert of my passengers for safety reasons, especially at night, so I kept looking in my rareview mirror at him. He grunted a few t


read more
UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

An alien broke out from Area 51 and started devouring all the homeless people nearby.

One could say it has poor taste.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

America is storming Area 51 Let Europe storm the Vatican.

America can have the Aliens.
Europe will get the Predators.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

A time traveling alien appears in a flash of light in a bar.

He is obviously having the night of his life when he turns to the bartender and asks for a two hundred thousand dead at area 51 cocktail...
The bar goes dead quiet as he looks around...oh shit too soon?

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Catholic priests should storm Area 51 so it would be Aliens vs Predators.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

When Americans storm area 51 and save the aliens, Europeans can storm the Vatican.

You will save the aliens and we'll save the children

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Area 51 and constipation are the same my dad says

A lot goes in but aint nothing coming out.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

If America is storming Area 51 then the Europeans can storm the Vatican

We’ll take the aliens, you get the predators

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Catholic Priests should storm Area 51

So it’s Aliens vs. Predator

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Priests should join the raid on area 51

So that it'll be aliens vs predators

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Why was 50 excited?

.
.
.
It's in Area 51

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

What does Area 51 and a g-spot have in common?

All these guys talking about what they’re going to do to it, but they can’t even find it.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

What does a neckbeard say when he gets into Area 51?

M'othership.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Area 51 jokes won't die until September 20th...

...just like the people that show up!

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Did you guys see the new Instagram meme?

They're going to try to raid area 51 on September 20th

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Guys don't raid Area 51

15 years ago, my dad went to raid Area 51, and never came back.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

These Area 51 memes are...

Out of this world

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Area 51 is like a vagina to conspiracy theorists.

They've heard all about it but they've never been inside.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE

Area 51 to a conspiracy theorist is like a vagina.

They've heard all about it but they've never been inside.

UPVOTE
DOWNVOTE
LOAD MORE