Adorable
Jokes
My son has adorable little baby hands
It was all over the news, apparently he took them from an open casket funeral
"Hey girl, that's a nice ass you got there"
"Aren't donkeys such adorable animals?"
My son has adorable little baby hands
What's the most adorable thing about Chernobyl?
A cute radiation poisoning
What do you call an adorable Mennonite?
Awwwmish
An adorable old woman visits the doctor.
“Doctor, I have this problem with gas, but it really doesn’t bother me too much. It never smells and is always silent. As a matter of fact, I’ve farted at least ten times since I’ve been here in your office. You didn’t know I was farting because it doesn’t smell and is silent.”
The doctor says, “I see. Take these pills and come back to s
Hi! My name is Gertrude, says the lady to the man next to her on the airplane.
“It’s so nice to meet you! I’m flying to New York for my grandson’s third birthday. I’m so excited! I remember when he was just a little pumpkin and now he’s already three! It’s really hard to believe. He’s the most adorable thing you’ve ever seen! You know what? Hold on, I think I might have a picture on me. Let me take a look in my purse. Yes
What do you call a cation?
Pawsitively adorable
What do you call an angle which is adorable?
Acute angle
Wife : how am i looking
Dad : ABCDEFGHIJK
WIFE : What do you mean?
Dad : Adorable, bomb, cute, delightful, erotic, Fab, glamorous and hot
Wife : oh my!!! Thanks ,and IJK?
DAD : I am Just Kidding.
Wife: "How would you describe me?"
Wife: "How would you describe me?"
Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."
Wife: "What does that mean?"
Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot."
Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"
Husband: **"I'm just kidding!"**
I left a present for my crush today, and she had me arrested!
When her cat does it, it's adorable, but apparently it's "creepy" when I leave a dead bird on her doorstep.
What kind of car does Jesus drive?
A Christ-ler
I just invented this joke, felt very adorable about myself and wanted to share.
My Pet goat Ralfie just got taken away from me. He was adorable, fluffy and moreover my best friend.
I will forever miss you my g.
A very ugly women goes shopping with her kids.
A man sees the women with her kids a says
He: "You got some adorable twins there!"
She: "Are you stupid? They aren't twins. One is 7 years old and the other is 2 years old"
He: "I mean yeah but I just couldn't imagine how anyone would fuck you twice!"
My nephew just asked me, "Is wind made from birds flapping their wings?" He's so adorable, isn't he?
WRONG! He's 24 and addicted to heroin.
A rich man has a talk
"I have to thank everybody who has assisted me to become a millionaire. In particular, I have to say thanks to my adorable wife" - says the rich man.
But somebody from the crowd shouts:
"Why? You were a billionaire before? "
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sry for crappy english
What do you call a cow with no legs?
A hamburger.
(Told to me by a 4 year old at a school play. Too adorable not to share.)
I AM JUST KIDDING
Wife: "How would you describe me?"
Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."
Wife: "What does that mean?"
Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot."
Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"
Husband: "I'm just kidding!"
Wife: "How would you describe me?"
Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."
Wife: "What does that mean?"
Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot."
Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"
Husband: "I'm just kidding!"
Dad, theres a monster under my bed! A kid cries.
The dad looks under, frowns, and pulls up a Kirby plush.
“Son, this is an adorable orb from space.”
Wife asks her husband, how would you describe me?
Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."
Wife: "What does that mean?"
Husband: "Adorable, Beautiful, Cute, Delightful, Elegant, Fashionable, Gorgeous, and Hot."
Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"
Husband: "I'm Just Kidding”
TIL that comparative brain scans of elephants reveal that they find humans to be "adorable".
I mean, your mom told me I was sexy, but I didn't realize that it was a biological reaction.
What do you call a very strong, yet adorable dog?
A puggernaut.
We finally get a robot onto an alien planet and the first thing we do is roll over an adorable little fuzzball. Its true.
Curiosity killed the cat.
We get a rovot on the surface of an alien planet and the first thing we do is roll over an adorable fuzz ball. Its True.
Curiosity killed the cat.
A woman texted me with the message, "Your adorable."
I texted back, "No. YOU'RE adorable."
Now she's falling for me. I was only correcting her grammar.
A seal in french is a Phoque so whoever came up with the word Phoque probably looked at the seal and said
It’s Phoque-ing adorable
My wife is....
Wife: “How would you describe me?”
Husband: “ABCDEFGHIJK.”
Wife: “What does that mean?”
Husband: “Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot.”
Wife: “Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?”
Husband: “I’m just kidding!”
Wife:"How would you describe me?"
Wife: "How would you describe me?"
Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."
Wife: "What does that mean?"
Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot."
Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"
Husband: "I'm just kidding!"
My wife asked me to describe her. I said you're abcdefghijk
She asked: What does that mean?
I said: Adorable, beautifull, cute, delightfull, elegant, foxy, gorgeous, hot.
She asked: Oh that's so nice, what is ijk?
I said: I'm just kidding
Water birds are pretty adorable
One might even say they're coot.
I love my neighbor's asian food
She pays me to walk him, and he's so fluffy and adorable
"I'm just kidding!"
Wife: "How would you describe me?"
Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."
Wife: "What does that mean?"
Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot."
Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"
Husband: "I'm just kidding!"
Wife and Husband
Wife: “How would you describe me?”
Husband: “ABCDEFGHIJK.”
Wife: “What does that mean?”
Husband: “Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot.”
Wife: “Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?”
Husband: “I’m just kidding!”
Can a window fly?
I dunno, is adorable to?
Wife: "How would you describe me?" Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK." Wife: "What does that mean?" Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot." Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?" Husband: "I'm just kidding!"
[deleted]
What is yellow, adorable, and causes birth defects?
[deleted]
What's yellow, adorable, and shrinks babies' brains?
[deleted]
Wife How would you describe me Husband
Wife: "How would you describe me?"
Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."
Wife: "What does that mean?"
Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot."
Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"
Husband: "I'm just kidding!"
"ABCDEFGHIJK."
Wife: "How would you describe me?"
Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."
Wife: "What does that mean?"
Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot."
Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"
Husband: "I'm just kidding!"
Offensive humor ...
If you write a joke about bunnies and carrots, it's adorable. If you write the same joke about (insert ethnic group) and (insert ethnic food), it's offensive. You didn't create these associations (and or stereotypes), but you are playing off of them.
Discuss.
Wife: "How would you describe me?"
Wife: "How would you describe me?"
Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."
Wife: "What does that mean?"
Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot."
Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"
Husband: "I'm just kidding!"
Hey, that's an adorable robot you have there, what's it's name?
[deleted]
Husband and wife describe me
Wife: "How would you describe me?"
Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."
Wife: "What does that mean?"
Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot."
Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"
Husband: "I'm just kidding!"
I'm just kidding!
Wife: "How would you describe me?"
Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."
Wife: "What does that mean?"
Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot."
Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"
Husband: "I'm just kidding!"
Wife and Husband
Wife: "How would you describe me?"
Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."
Wife: "What does that mean?"
Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot."
Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"
Husband: "I'm just kidding!"
Husband and Wife
Wife: "How would you describe me?" Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK." Wife: "What does that mean?" Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot." Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?" Husband: "I'm just kidding!"
How would you describe me
Wife: "How would you describe me?"
Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."
Wife: "What does that mean?"
Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot."
Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"
Husband: "I'm just kidding!"
Dad And Mom Complements
Wife: "How would you describe me?"
Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK."
Wife: "What does that mean?"
Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot."
Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?"
Husband: "I'm just kidding!"